Transcript: Student Session 4A | Aug 24, 1998

The opening slate pops up with a countdown timer from 7 seconds and the title “TVO’s Virtual Classroom. Get connected.”
The “V” in “Virtual” is a tick, the “A” in “classroom” is an at sign with an extended loop that turns into a power cord with a plug at the end, and the first “O” in “classroom” is a spinning globe.

When the countdown finishes, a slate appears with the following information: Series title, Language Alive Student Sessions; Program title, Session 4; Host, Alexa Usher-Jones; Date, May 29-98; Time, 9 to 10 AM; Help line, 1-888-371-1917

Missus UJ is in her late forties, with shoulder-length wavy blond hair with bangs. She wears a black V-neck top, a pale yellow blazer and a gold pendant necklace.

She says HI.
AND WELCOME BACK
TO LANGUAGE ALIVE.
I'M SO EXCITED
TO BE BACK TODAY.
I HOPE THAT YOU ALL HAVE
YOUR AGENDAS IN FRONT,
AND YOU'VE SET IT UP
WITH TODAY'S DATE,
WHICH IS MAY 29, AND THIS
IS SESSION NUMBER FOUR.
SO MY GOODNESS, WE ONLY
HAVE TWO MORE AFTER THIS.
I'M GOING TO BE SO SORRY
WHEN THIS IS ALL OVER.
YESTERDAY, I HAD JUST THE
BEST DAY WHEN I CAME
INTO THE STUDIO BECAUSE
A NUMBER OF STUDENTS,
AND I'M GOING TO SHOWCASE
THEM THIS MORNING BEFORE
WE GET GOING ON TODAY'S
THEME WHICH IS EDITING,
AND A NUMBER OF STUDENTS
DID SOME FABULOUS THINGS.
AND THEY SENT IN, AFTER LAST
WEEK'S VIRTUAL CHALLENGE,
THE BEST PIECES OF
WRITING THAT I HAVE SEEN
IN A LONG TIME.
AND I'M GOING TO SHOW
THEM TO YOU THIS MORNING.
AND I KNOW ALL OF YOU HAVE
BEEN WORKING ON THEM.
AND THIS MIGHT GIVE
YOU SOME IDEAS.
CERTAINLY, YOU WILL BE
IMPRESSED AS I WAS.
AND I THANK ALL OF THOSE
STUDENTS, AND Missus GAGNON,
THE TEACHER, FOR
DOING A WONDERFUL JOB.
SO LET'S TAKE A LOOK
AT THESE THIS MORNING.
AND I'M SURE YOU WILL SEE WE
CERTAINLY HAVE AN EXCELLENT
VOICE, AND WE CERTAINLY
HAVE A GREAT AUDIENCE.
AND THAT'S WHY IT'S
IMPORTANT TO LEARN HOW
TO WRITE, AND TO
WRITE WELL.

A sheet of paper with a pie chart appears on screen. In each quarter each of the following words can be read: see, feel, think, do.

Missus UJ says NOW, REMEMBER LAST
WEEK WE STARTED OFF
AFTER WE WATCHED
THE ORANGUTAN.
AND WHEN WE WERE
FINISHED WITH IT,
WE TALKED ABOUT
THINGS WE COULD SEE,
THINGS WE COULD FEEL,
WHAT WE THOUGHT ABOUT IT,
AND BASICALLY WHAT WE
WANTED TO DO ABOUT IT.
SO THIS IS WHAT ELGIN
AVENUE CAME UP WITH.

A drawing of an orangutan with shotguns pointing at it appears on screen. A caption on the drawing reads “Don’t we all need a place to call home.”

Missus UJ says FIRST OF ALL, THERE WERE
A NUMBER OF STUDENTS,
AND I REMEMBER TALKING
TO GARRET ON THE PHONE,
WHO I THINK IS A HUNTER,
AND HE DID AN AMAZING
POSTER TALKING
ABOUT, DON'T WE
ALL NEED A PLACE
TO CALL HOME?
AND WITH THAT, HE ALSO
WROTE A WONDERFUL
LETTER TO Missus U.J.
AND I'LL JUST READ
YOU A COUPLE OF LINES.
I'M SORRY, GUYS, I WON'T
BE ABLE TO READ ALL OF
EVERYTHING, BUT I'LL KIND OF
HIGHLIGHT SO EVERYONE
GETS THEIR WORK ON
THE AIR THIS MORNING.
“I'VE WRITTEN
THIS LETTER FOR
THE HUNTERS AND
THE ANIMALS.
YOUR POACHING IS HUNTING
THE GUN LAWS AND MAKING
A BAD NAME FOR
THE HUNTERS.”
AND I REMEMBER, GARRET,
THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE.
“SOME OF THE ANIMALS YOU
KILL MAY NOT HAVE A SECOND
CHANCE TO LIVE ON BECAUSE
OF YOU AND YOUR TYPE.”
SO HE REQUESTS ME,
REMEMBER THE POACHER,
REMEMBER, GUYS, I WAS
JUST KIDDING ABOUT THAT,
I'M NOT REALLY
A POACHER.
THANKS, GARRET
FOR SENDING THAT.

She shows another drawing with a hunting scene, a stop sign and the caption “Stop poaching.”

Missus UJ says HERE WE HAVE ANOTHER
WONDERFUL POSTER.
YOU CAN SEE ALL THE WORK
THAT'S GONE INTO IT.
WE'VE GOT “STOP
POACHING,” AND
SOME WONDERFUL
ILLUSTRATION.
THIS IS BY JODIE,
ANGELA, AND AMANDA.
VERY WELL DONE.
I LIKE THE WAY YOU'VE
ORGANIZED IT ON THE PAGE.
THAT'S GREAT.

She shows another drawing showing orangutans, gun prohibition signs and the captions “Stop poaching orangutans now” and “It’s not nice to poach.”

Missus UJ says OKAY, THE NEXT ONE WAS
FROM DEREK AND DARREN.
AND THEY HAVE A
WONDERFUL POSTER.
LOOK AT THE
ILLUSTRATIONS.
YOU CAN'T SEE
THEM AS WELL.
I KNOW THE TEACHER TOLD
ME, THEY WERE ACTUALLY
LARGE POSTERS THAT THEY
COLOURED AND SO ON,
SO WE HAD TO BRING THEM
DOWN TO SIZE TO GET
THEM ON AIR FOR YOU.
“STOP POACHING THE
ORANGUTANS NOW.
IT'S NOT NICE TO POACH.”
LOOK AT THESE WONDERFUL
SYMBOLS AND THINGS,
AND THESE GREAT LITTLE
ORANGUTANS ENJOYING
THEIR RAINFOREST, WHICH
REMEMBER IN THE VIDEO,
WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM THEM.

Another miniature poster appears on screen with the caption “Stop the poaching” and the drawing of an eagle.

Missus UJ says HERE'S ANOTHER POSTER
ON “STOP THE POACHING.”
FROM MIKE AT ELGIN AVENUE.
AND HE LEAVES A
MESSAGE ON THE BOTTOM.
AND HE'S WORKED VERY HARD
ON HIS COMPUTER TO DO THIS.
“I DO BELIEVE WHAT YOU
ARE DOING IS WRONG.
THE ILLEGAL KILLING THAT YOU
DO IS A HORRIBLE THING TO DO.”
AND HE GOES ON TO SAY.
THE NEXT ONE IS FROM
STEVE, AND HE WRITES,
“I THINK PEOPLE SHOULD STOP
POACHING ORANGUTANS BECAUSE
IF PEOPLE KEEP POACHING,
THERE WON'T BE ANY LEFT
IN THE FUTURE FOR PEOPLE
TO SEE AND TO LEARN ABOUT.”
AND THAT WAS AN
EXCELLENT LETTER ALSO.
I CAN'T READ ALL
OF IT, STEVE,
BUT THANK YOU VERY
MUCH FOR THAT ONE.

She shows another poster with the drawing of an orangutan peeling a banana.

Missus UJ says NOW, HERE'S A
WONDERFUL FACE.
LOOK AT THE FACE
ON THIS ORANGUTAN.
AND THIS WAS DONE BY CHRIS,
ALSO FROM ELGIN AVENUE.
AND HE'S GOT A GREAT
LITTLE ORANGUTAN HERE.
AND IT SAYS, “PLEASE
DON'T POACH ME.”
SO THE PLEA FROM
THE ORANGUTANS.

Another poster appears on screen with stop signs and the caption “Stop poaching the orangutans.”

Missus UJ says HERE'S A
WONDERFUL POSTER.
I IMAGINE THIS WAS
DONE QUITE LARGE.
THIS IS BY KELLY
AND LINDSAY.
AND THEY WROTE A
LETTER TO Missus U.J. AND
I'LL JUST READ A COUPLE
OF HIGHLIGHTS FROM THAT.
IT SAYS, “I AM DISGUSTED
WITH YOUR BEHAVIOUR
OF POACHING THOSE POOR,
INNOCENT ORANGUTANS.
IT'S NOT FAIR FOR
THEM, AND YOU WOULDN'T
LIKE IT IF THEY
DID IT TO YOU.”
AND YOU'RE RIGHT, I
CERTAINLY WOULDN'T.
SO THANKS FOR
SENDING THAT.
THAT WAS GREAT.

A blurry poster with the caption “Goal Chamber News” appears on screen.

Missus UJ says HERE'S A REALLY
INTERESTING ONE.
I REALLY LIKE IT WHEN
KIDS SORT OF ADD ON
AND DO SOME ART
AND SO ON.
THIS WAS REALLY
CREATIVE THINKING.
THIS WAS DONE BY
BRANDON AND STEWART.
AND THEY'VE COME UP -
YOU CAN'T REALLY SEE IT
BECAUSE WE'VE
MADE IT SO SMALL.
WHAT THEY HAVE IS THEY HAVE
THIS LITTLE DEVICE THEY
PUT IN THE ANIMALS, AND
IF THEY ARE BEING POACHED,
AN ALARM GOES
OFF, I UNDERSTAND,
AND THAT ALARMS ALL THE
OTHER HUNTERS AND OTHER
ANIMALS THAT ACTUALLY
SOMETHING IS ABOUT
TO HAPPEN TO THEM.
SO THAT WAS A
REALLY GOOD IDEA.
AND YOU CAN SEE THEY'VE
GOT, I THINK IT'S THE
COAL CHAMBER NEWS, AND THEY
TOOK THE IDEA OF ACTUALLY
CREATING YOUR OWN PAPER,
WHICH WAS A GREAT IDEA.
REMEMBER WE TALKED ABOUT
THE THINGS THE SUPERSTARS
WOULD BE ABLE TO DO.
HERE WAS A LETTER FROM
JENNIFER AND CRYSTAL.
AND THEY GO ON TO SAY
“Missus U.J., AS WE UNDERSTAND,
YOU ARE A POACHER, AND
WE ARE WRITING THIS LETTER
TO ASK YOU TO PLEASE
STOP POACHING.
WE THINK IT IS WRONG
TO KILL AN ANIMAL FOR
ITS BODY PARTS
AND FURS.
IF YOU CAN'T THINK OF A
REASON TO STOP POACHING,
MAYBE WE CAN GIVE
YOU A COUPLE.”
AND THEN THEY GO ON
TO GIVE THEIR REASONS.
“WE WOULD LIKE IT IF YOU
WOULD STOP POACHING,
AND THINK OF
OTHER PEOPLE.”
SO THANK YOU, THAT WAS A
VERY, VERY STRONG LETTER.
AND THANK YOU VERY
MUCH FOR THAT.
NOW REMEMBER, I ALSO TALKED
ABOUT IF YOU WANTED TO BE
A SUPERSTAR, ALL THE THINGS
YOU COULD DO TO DO THAT.
AND ONE OF THE THINGS I SAID
IS PERHAPS YOU COULD BECOME
A TEAM, AND YOU COULD
BECOME AN EDITING TEAM.
AND WITH THAT, YOU COULD
PERHAPS CREATE A NEWSPAPER,
AND SOMEONE COULD
WRITE A NEWS ARTICLE,
AND YOU COULD DO SOME
OPINION POLLS AND LETTERS
TO THE EDITOR AND SO ON.
WELL, THE STUDENTS OF ELGIN
PUBLIC SCHOOL DID JUST THAT.

Missus UJ read shows and article written by the students of Elgin Public School entitled “Special Edition. Save the orangutans.”

Missus UJ says AND WE HAVE A LOT OF
SUPERSTARS THERE THIS MORNING.
I'M JUST GOING TO QUICKLY
SORT OF GO OVER AND SHOW YOU.
THEY HAVE A SPECIAL EDITION,
AND THEY HAVE A NUMBER
OF WONDERFUL THINGS HERE.
SO THEY HAVE
“SPECIAL EDITION,
SAVE THE ORANGUTANS.”
AND THEY TOOK ALSO THE IDEA
OF GOING INTO PROBABLY
THEIR INTERNETS, AND
RESOURCE BOOKS AND SO ON,
AND THEY DID A LOT
OF INFORMATION,
AND THEY GATHERED ALL
KINDS OF INFORMATION ABOUT
THE ORANGUTANS FIRST.
THIS WAS JODIE,
SHANNON, BECKY, KATIE,
TARYN AND ELISE.
GOOD JOB.
SO THEY'VE ALL
WRITTEN ARTICLES.
WE ALSO HAVE A WONDERFUL,
I THINK THIS IS A LETTER
TO THE EDITOR AT
THE BOTTOM.
I'LL JUST READ YOU
SOME OF THE HIGHLIGHTS.
“WHY SHOULD WE SAVE THE
TROPICAL RAINFOREST?”
AND THEY GO ON TO TALK
ABOUT REGULATING
THE CLIMATE AND THE LOCAL
WEATHER CONDITIONS,
AND “DON'T LET PEOPLE
DESTROY THE RAINFOREST
BECAUSE IT MIGHT HELP
YOU IN YOUR FUTURE.”
SO THAT WAS AN
EXCELLENT ONE.
HERE'S SHANNON HAS
WRITTEN SOMETHING.
YOU CAN'T SEE IT, BUT WE
TALKED ABOUT THE DO PART
OF THE RESPONSE WHEEL.
AND SHANNON'S GIVEN US LOTS
OF IDEAS ON WHAT WE CAN DO.
AND WHAT CAN
YOU DO ABOUT IT,
SHE'S PUTTING OUT TO US.
SHE'S GIVEN A WEB PAGE
AND GONE ON TO TALK ABOUT
SOME OF THE PEOPLE THAT
ARE BEING KILLED -
SOME OF THE PEOPLE THAT ARE
KILLING THE ORANGUTANS.
SO THAT WAS A REALLY
GOOD ARTICLE, SHANNON.
SOME PEOPLE HERE HAVE GIVEN
PERSONAL COMMENTS WHERE
THEY ACTUALLY WENT TO
PEOPLE, ONE ANONYMOUS,
BUT SOME OTHER PEOPLE
AND ASKED THEM
TO GIVE THEM
PERSONAL COMMENTS.
SO ANOTHER WAY OF DOING
RESEARCH IS GOING TO YOUR
FRIENDS AND TO THE PEOPLE.
THEY ALSO DID AN OPINION POLL
WHERE THEY DID A PHONE POLL.
THEY FOUND OUT 97 PERCENT
ARE AGAINST POACHING,
AND ONLY 2 PERCENT
ARE FOR IT.
WE DON'T KNOW
WHO THEY ARE.
BUT THAT WAS AN
EXCELLENT IDEA.
WHAT A GOOD WAY, AND THEN
WRITING UP YOUR OPINION POLL
AS A WAY OF EXPRESSING
SOME RESEARCH.
GREAT IDEA.
HERE WE HAVE THE RAINFOREST,
AND A MAP THEY'VE INCLUDED.
GOOD RESEARCHING, GUYS.
AND HERE'S THE REASONS WHY
WE SHOULD STOP POACHING.
THIS IS BY KATIE.
AND SHE GIVES ALL SORTS OF
THINGS THAT YOU CAN DO.
AND SHE TELLS US YOU
CAN DO A PETITION,
A LETTER, A PROTEST.
SO SHE'S REALLY THOUGHT
ABOUT THE KINDS OF THINGS
THAT YOU CAN DO TO BE
PROACTIVE WHEN
YOU FEEL STRONGLY
ABOUT SOMETHING.
AND OF COURSE, THESE
ARE THINGS WE CAN DO.
YOU CAN TAKE THIS IDEA
FROM THIS PROJECT
WE'VE DONE ON
LANGUAGE ALIVE.
WHEN YOU FEEL STRONGLY
ABOUT SOMETHING IN YOUR
COMMUNITY, THAT'S A REALLY
GOOD IDEA TO COMMUNICATE
ORALLY AND IN
WRITTEN LANGUAGE,
AND TO GET YOUR
OPINIONS OUT THERE.
YOU CAN MAYBE DO SOMETHING
ABOUT A GOOD CAUSE.

She shows another newspaper called “The Rain forest Review” with the headline “Why shouldn’t poachers poach orangutans.”

Missus UJ says NOW, HERE'S A WHOLE
NEWSPAPER CALLED
“THE RAINFOREST REVIEW.”
SOME OF THE HEADLINES ARE
“WHY SHOULDN'T POACHERS
POACH ORANGUTANS?”
THIS IS BY JEFF
AND GREG.
THEY'VE GOT A SOCCER
PLAYING ORANGUTANS,
AND THEY HAVE ONE NOTE
AT THE BOTTOM
THAT'S KIND OF INTERESTING.
IT SAYS, “A UNANIMOUS TIP
REVEALED THAT Missus U.J.
WAS THE LEADER OF THE
POACHERS, AND HAD KILLED
MOST OF THE ORANGUTANS.”
BUT OF COURSE, THEY'RE
JUST KIDDING, RIGHT GUYS?

Another article appears on screen under the title “About the orangutans.” The article is divided under 3 subtitles: “Habitat,” “Diet” and “Growth.”

Missus UJ says THE NEXT ONE IS ALL
ABOUT ORANGUTANS,
AND THEY DID A LOT
OF RESEARCH ON THAT.
AND LOOK AT THESE
WONDERFUL LITTLE PHOTOS
AND THINGS
THEY'VE INCLUDED.
I LIKE HOW YOU'VE
ORGANIZED THIS.
YOU'VE WORKED VERY HARD
ON YOUR COMPUTERS
TO ORGANIZE YOUR RESEARCH.
AND IT'S A GOOD IDEA WHEN
YOU TAKE PIECES OF RESEARCH
THAT OF COURSE YOU
HAVE TO PUT THINGS
IN YOUR OWN WORDS.
THAT'S TIME CONSUMING, BUT
THEN IT BELONGS TO YOU.
THEY'VE GOT THE
BEHAVIOUR.

She turns the page and a picture of an orangutan with the caption “Isn’t he a cutie? Appears.

Missus UJ says “ISN'T HE A CUTEY?”
AND YES, HE
CERTAINLY IS.
“STOP THE POACHING,
DO YOUR PART.”
THEY'VE GOT ALL
ABOUT POACHING,
AND WHY IT IS ILLEGAL,
AND A NOTICE TO POACHERS,
AND WHERE YOU CAN
REPORT A POACHER.
THEY'VE INCLUDED
NUMBERS AND SO ON.
THAT WAS GREAT.
NOW, GAVIN HAS A WONDERFUL

Another poster appears with the image of an orangutan hanging from a prohibition sign and the caption “Stop poaching.”

Missus UJ says I LOVE THIS POSTER
ON POACHING, WITH THE
ORANGUTAN IN THE CENTRE,
AND THE DON'T
DO IT SIGN.
THAT WAS A GREAT
ONE, ALSO.
SO I THANK ALL OF YOU.
THAT WAS JUST A WONDERFUL
PROJECT THAT YOU DID.
AND THANK YOU.
NOW, FOR ALL OF YOU
FROM THE OTHER SCHOOLS
THAT ARE LOGGED
IN THIS MORNING,
I KNOW YOU ARE WORKING
ON YOUR PROJECTS.
IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO
FAX THEM IN TO ME.
AND NEXT WEEK, I
CERTAINLY WILL SHOWCASE
YOUR THINGS IF
YOU SEND THEM.
AND OUR LAST SHOW WHICH WILL
BE ON SUMMERTIME LEARNING,
THERE WILL STILL BE TIME, IF
YOU HAVE YOUR BOOK BURGERS,
OR ANY OF THE PROJECTS
I'VE GIVEN YOU TO WORK ON,
IF YOU WANT TO GET THEM IN,
I'LL MAKE SURE YOU GET
YOUR NAME AND YOUR WORK
RIGHT UP HERE ON THE AIR
FOR EVERYONE TO SEE.
BECAUSE REMEMBER, WHAT
WE ARE TRYING TO DO
IN LANGUAGE ALIVE IS WE
ARE CREATING AN AUDIENCE.
AND WE KNOW IF WE HAVE AN
AUDIENCE FOR OUR WRITING,
WE'RE GOING TO DO THE
BEST JOB WE POSSIBLY CAN.
NOW, I ALSO WANT TO THANK
FROM COLLEGE AVENUE THIS
MORNING, THEY UNFORTUNATELY
BECAUSE WE WERE SO BUSY
ON THE PHONES LAST
WEEK, THEY DIDN'T GET
THEIR SPELLING IDEA OUT.
SO I'M GOING TO JUST SHOW
THAT TO YOU BECAUSE
IT'S SUCH A GREAT
LITTLE IDEA.

Missus UJ shows a sheet of paper with the word “Spellamadoodle” inside a cloud and a triangle just below it. A caption reads “From: F. Robinson. College Avenue. P.S. Gueph.”

Missus UJ says AND THIS IS CALLED
SPELLAMADOODLE.
AND WHAT A GREAT IDEA.
REMEMBER LAST WEEK WHEN
WE DID FINALLY SEE
THE CORRECT SPELLING OF
ORANGUTAN UP THERE,
EVEN THOUGH ABOUT 70
PERCENT OF US THOUGHT
THAT IT WAS SPELLED A-N-G,
THE FIRST THING WE DID
ONCE WE SAW IT SPELLED
CORRECTLY WAS TO WRITE
IT OUT THREE TIMES EACH.
SO COLLEGE AVENUE HAS
SENT US THIS GREAT IDEA.
AND SPELLAMADOODLE
IS YOU MAKE A SHAPE.
I'VE JUST MADE
A TRIANGLE HERE.
YOU CAN MAKE ANY
SHAPE THAT YOU WANT.
AND WHAT YOU DO, YOU
JUST DOODLE AWAY,
AND YOU WRITE EACH OF YOUR
SPELLING WORDS THREE TIMES
EACH ALONG THE SHAPE.
SO REALLY, YOU'RE
JUST DOODLING.
WHAT A GOOD IDEA TO DOODLE
YOUR SPELLING WORDS.
SO I THANK YOU FOR
SENDING THAT IN.
THAT WAS TERRIFIC.
NOW, WE'RE GOING TO GET
READY FOR OUR WRITING
PROMPT THIS MORNING.
AND OF COURSE, WE'RE GOING
TO BE GOING TO A VIDEO CLIP.
WHAT I'M GOING TO
ASK YOU TO DO FIRST
IS WE'RE GOING
TO HAVE A BUZZ.
AND IN THAT BUZZ, I'M
GOING TO MOVE YOU NOW FROM
THE RAINFOREST, AND
WE'RE GOING TO MOVE
INTO UNDER THE WATER
AND UNDER THE SEA.
SO THIS IS QUITE
A HUGE CHANGE.
SO JUST TO GET US
GOING ON THAT IDEA,
WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO
IS I WANT YOU TO BUZZ.
I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU 30
SECONDS, LESS THAN A MINUTE,
WITH YOUR PARTNER, TO
MAKE A GREAT ORAL LIST
OF UNDERWATER WORDS.
SO YOU CAN GET READY
TO DO THAT RIGHT NOW.

A blank sheet of paper with the title “Sea Creatures and features” appears on screen. Missus UJ slowly moves a stuffed octopus on top of the paper.

Missus UJ says I THINK WE BETTER
START THE VIDEO.

[gurgling water]

A video rolls. Images of the surface and the bottom of the ocean appear. Different sea life specimens appear.

Missus UJ says JUST LISTEN TO THE
SOUND OF THAT WATER.
IT'S SO MUCH NICER THAN THE
RAINFOREST CUTTING DOWN.
LOOK AT THE WILDLIFE
UNDERNEATH.
BEAUTIFUL MOVING
PLANTLIFE.
THE MOTHER OCTOPUS BLOWING
OXYGEN ON HER EGGS.
THERE GOES ONE.
READY TO HATCH.
DID YOU KNOW AN OCTOPUS
CAN BE ANYWHERE FROM
TWO CENTIMETRES IN SIZE ALL
THE WAY TO 11 METRES
IN THE PACIFIC OCEAN?
WHAT AN AMAZING CREATURE.
SO MANY DIFFERENT
KINDS OF OCTOPUSES.
LOOK AT THE SIZE
OF THE HEAD.

An orange octopus is approached by a shoal of fish buries itself in the sand.

Missus UJ says OOH, DOWN, DOWN,
AND DOWN FURTHER.
ISN'T IT AMAZING?

A different octopus captures a fish with his tentacles.

Missus UJ says LOOK AT THOSE SUCTION
CUPS UNDERNEATH THE LEGS,
THE TENTACLES.
ROWS OF SUCTION CUPS.
WATCH WHAT HAPPENS.
HERE IT COMES,
THE MORAY EEL.
LOOK AT THAT EYE.
WASN'T THAT FABULOUS?
DID YOU SEE THE EYE OF
THAT OCTOPUS HAS IT HAD
ALL THE TENTACLES WRAPPED
AROUND, JUST LOOKING.
DID YOU SEE THE
EYE THERE?
WASN'T THAT AMAZING?
NOW, HERE'S WHAT
I'D LIKE YOU TO DO.
GET A PIECE OF PAPER.
SOME OF YOU MAY HAVE A
VOCABULARY CONCEPT
BUILDER WITH YOU.
IF NOT, LET'S TOGETHER
QUICKLY MAKE THE BOXES.
REMEMBER, WE STARTED
WITH A BOX AT THE TOP,
THEN WE HAD THE LEFT SIDE
WITH THE BOX, RIGHT SIDE,
AND TOGETHER, WHAT DO
THEY MAKE YOU THINK OF?
WE HAVE THE BOTTOM.

She draws a conceptual map with a tip and bottom box and one box on each side. She writes the word “octopus” in the top box.

Missus UJ says OKAY, I'M GOING
TO PUT OCTOPUS.
AND I'M GOING TO GET
YOU CALLING IN QUICKLY.
WHAT WE WANT ARE
WORDS, SINGLE WORDS,
CHUNKS OF WORDS,
SEA CREATURES
AND SOME OF THE
FEATURES.
THAT'S WHAT THIS
VIDEO WAS ALL ABOUT.
FOCUSSING IN ON
THE OCTOPUS.
CALL IN WITH SOME
IDEAS, SOME WORDS.
I'LL GIVE YOU A
COUPLE OF MINUTES
TO GET WORKING ON THAT,
THEN CALL IN YOUR ANSWERS.
GOOD MORNING,
JACK MINER.

A Jack Miner School caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI, JACK MINER?
HI, WHAT IS
YOUR NAME?

The caller says JUSTIN.

Missus UJ says OH, HI.
DID YOU LIKE THAT
VIDEO ON THE OCTOPUS?

Justin says YES.

Missus UJ says OH, GREAT.
WHAT KIND OF WORDS
CAME TO YOUR MIND WHEN
YOU SAW THAT OCTOPUS?

Justin says THE SUCTION CUPS.

Missus UJ says WEREN'T THEY AMAZING?
I WONDER HOW
THEY REALLY WORK.

Justin says THE TENTACLES.

Missus UJ says RIGHT.
AND WHEN YOU THINK
OF THE SUCTION CUPS
AND THE TENTACLES,
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF?

Justin says UNDERWATER.

Missus UJ says UNDERWATER.
GOOD, GOOD.
THANKS VERY MUCH
FOR CALLING IN.
THOSE ARE GREAT.

She writes down each concept in one of the remaining boxes.

Missus UJ says I THINK WHAT I'M GOING TO DO
IS AS CALLERS KEEP COMING IN,
WE'LL JUST KEEP
ADDING TO OUR BOXES
THAT WE HAVE ON
THE OCTOPUS.
OKAY?
GREAT, GOOD MORNING.

She brings another conceptual map with the word “octopus” in the top box.

The caller says HI.

Missus UJ says WHO AM I SPEAKING TO?

The caller says ANDREA.

Missus UJ says HAVE YOU GOT SOME WORDS
COMING ON THE OCTOPUS?

Andrea says YEAH.

Missus UJ says GREAT.
WHAT WORDS DID
YOU COME UP WITH?

Andrea says SQUID.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
NOW, REMEMBER WHEN WE
ARE DOING OUR VOCABULARY
BUILDING, SPELLING DOESN'T
COULD WANT BECAUSE WE
WANT TO REACH FOR THE
BEST WORDS WE CAN.
WE CAN EDIT THAT
STUFF LATER, RIGHT?

Andrea says YEAH.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
SO WHEN YOU
THINK OF OCTOPUS,
WHAT ELSE DO
YOU THINK ABOUT?

Andrea says JELLYFISH.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
AND WHEN YOU THINK OF
SQUID AND JELLYFISH,
WHAT DOES THAT
MAKE YOU THINK OF?

Andrea says MY BATHTUB.

She completes the conceptual map with all three terms.

Missus UJ says SO YOU HAVE YOUR OWN
UNDERWATER PLAY TIME,
DO YOU?
OKAY, OKAY, THANKS
FOR CALLING IN.
BYE.
OKAY, NOW THERE'S
AN INTERESTING ONE.
OKAY, LET'S TRY AND FOCUS
ON THE SEA CREATURES
AND THE FEATURES,
AND I THINK WE'VE
GOT SOME MORE
CALLERS COMING IN.
REMEMBER, DON'T WORRY, WHEN
YOU'RE BUILDING VOCABULARY,
DON'T WORRY ABOUT
YOUR SPELLING.
TRY TO GET THE
BEST WORD.
DON'T PUT DOWN BIG IF
YOU'D RATHER USE ENORMOUS.
YOU CAN CHECK
THAT ONE LATER.
HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI, WHO AM I SPEAKING TO?

The caller says JEFF.

Missus UJ says THANKS FOR SENDING ALL
YOUR THINGS, IN, JEFF.
I JUST LOVED IT.
IT WAS GREAT.
NOW, WHAT KIND OF WORDS
HAVE YOU GOT COMING OUT
OF THE OCTOPUS ACTIVITY?

Jeff says INK.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
NOW, WHAT IS THE
INK USED FOR?
DO YOU KNOW?

Jeff says TO KEEP PREDATORS
AWAY FROM THEM.

Missus UJ says EXACTLY.
TO ME, IT SORT OF
REMINDS ME OF A SKUNK,
WHERE THEY GET
THAT SCENT GOING,
AND THAT'S GOING TO
SCARE EVERYONE AWAY.
I LIKE THE WORD PREDATOR.
WHEN YOU THINK OF OCTOPUS,
WHAT ELSE DO YOU THINK ABOUT?

Jeff says LEGS.

Missus UJ says LEGS, OKAY.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
WE CALL THOSE LEGS?

Jeff says TENTACLES.

Missus UJ says AND DO YOU KNOW HOW
MANY THE OCTOPUS HAS?

Jeff says EIGHT.

Missus UJ says GREAT.
GOOD FOR YOU.
AND WHAT DO WE HAVE
UNDERNEATH THOSE?

Jeff says SEA CREATURES?

Missus UJ says YES, BUT UNDERNEATH
HIS TENTACLES.
DID YOU SEE THAT
IN THE VIDEO?

Jeff says OH, YEAH, THE
SUCTION CUPS.

Missus UJ says WHY IS THAT
SUCH A GOOD IDEA?

Jeff says TO HOLD ON TO THINGS.

Missus UJ says EXACTLY.
GREAT.
IF YOU WERE WALKING ON THE
SLIPPERY SIDE OF THE POOL,
WE WOULD NEED THOSE
TOO, WOULDN'T WE?
OKAY, WHEN YOU THINK OF
INK, AND YOU THINK OF LEGS,
WHAT DOES THAT
MAKE YOU THINK OF?

Jeff says SEA CREATURES?

Missus UJ says SEA CREATURES, GOOD.
THANKS FOR CALLING IN.

She adds “ink,” “legs” and “sea creatures” to the boxes.

Missus UJ says OKAY, WE'LL HEAR ONE MORE
THEN WE'LL GET GOING
ONTO THE WRITER'S PROMPT.
WE'VE GOT SOME REALLY
GOOD ONES THERE.
LET'S SEE IF WE CAN GATHER
UP SOME CHUNKS OF WORDS.
SOME REALLY GOOD
DESCRIPTION.
OKAY, GOOD MORNING.
HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HELLO?

Missus UJ says HI, LEE.
IS THIS PINE'S AVENUE?

Lee says YEAH.

Missus UJ says HI.
WHAT DO YOU HAVE
ON THE OCTOPUS?

Lee says I HAVE SUCTION.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
AND WHEN YOU THINK
OF AN OCTOPUS,
WHAT ELSE DID YOU
THINK OF?

Lee says ORANGE.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
WASN'T THAN
AMAZING OCTOPUS?
THE ONE THAT WENT DOWN?
LOVED THAT ONE.
OKAY, WHEN YOU
THINK OF SUCTION,
AND YOU THINK OF
ORANGE, WHAT DOES
THAT MAKE YOU
THINK OF?

Lee says UNDER WATER.

She adds “Suction,” “orange” and “under water” to the map.

Missus UJ says GOOD FOR YOU.
THANKS FOR CALLING IN.
OKAY, I'M NOT GOING TO BE
ABLE TO TAKE ANY MORE CALLS
ON THAT RIGHT NOW, BUT HOLD
ON BECAUSE SOMETIMES
AT THE END OF THE
SHOW, WE DO HAVE TIME,
AND YOU CAN ALWAYS
FAX THESE IN TO ME,
AND WE CAN DO SOMETHING
WITH THEM NEXT DAY.
NOW, WHAT I'D LIKE YOU
TO DO IS ON YOUR AGENDAS,
GET DOWN THE
WRITING PROMPT,
AND WHAT I'D LIKE YOU TO DO
IS CREATE SOME INTERESTING
SENTENCES USING YOUR
CONCEPT BUILDER.
AND YOU CAN EVEN TURN
SOME OF THOSE SENTENCES
INTO A WONDERFUL STORY.
NOW, WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO,
WHILE YOU ARE COPYING THAT
DOWN, I'LL JUST MOVE ON.
WE'RE GOING TO DO A
LOT OF EDITING TODAY.
AND WE'RE GOING TO TAKE
LITTLE BITS AND PIECES
FROM THAT VIDEO, TO LEARN HOW
TO EDIT AND TO TALK ABOUT
WHAT THE MAINFRAME OF
OUR LESSON IS TODAY.
NOW, WHAT I WOULD
LIKE YOU TO DO,
AND IT'S JUST GOING
TO BE A QUIET MOMENT,
I'M GOING TO ACTUALLY
WRITE SOMETHING FOR YOU.
I'M GOING TO COMPOSE
SOMETHING FOR YOU,
AND YOU CAN SEE EVEN
THOUGH I'M A TEACHER,
WHEN I DO SOMETHING, WHEN
I WRITE A FIRST DRAFT
OF SOMETHING, I'M NEVER
REALLY VERY HAPPY
WITH WHAT IT LOOKS
LIKE ORIGINALLY.

She places a sheet of paper with a seal that reads “draft” on the upper right corner.

Missus UJ says NOW, YOU CAN SEE I'VE
GOT THE WORD DRAFT,
AND I'LL JUST SHOW
YOU RIGHT THERE.
I HAVE A DRAFT STAMP, AND
WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT,
IN OUR VIRTUAL CHALLENGE,
WE'RE GOING TO BE MAKING
SOME EDITING KITS.
AND THIS IS GREAT.
WHEN YOU ARE
DOING SOMETHING,
AND YOU DON'T WANT
SPELLING TO COUNT,
AND IT'S JUST YOUR
FIRST TIME THROUGH IT,
IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO
JUST HAVE ONE OF THESE.
YOU CAN GET ONE OF THESE IN
ANY OF THE BUSINESS STORES,
AND YOU JUST PUNCH
IT DRAFT.
SO WHEN ANYONE
IS READING THAT,
THEY KNOW IT'S REALLY
JUST YOUR FIRST ATTEMPT,
AND YOU'RE JUST GETTING
YOUR IDEAS AND YOUR
JUICES FLOWING
AND SO ON.
SO JUST VERY QUIETLY, I'M
GOING TO WRITE YOU SOMETHING
THAT I CAN THINK OF FROM THE
WRITING PIECE THAT WE DID.
SO JUST WATCH QUIETLY.

She writes “The mottled moray eel is the enemy of the octopus. It crawls down into the hole of the octopus.” Then she crosses out “enemy of the octopus” and replaces it with “bone of its existence.” Then she crosses out the word “crawls” and writes “creeps.” She then replaces the phrase “hole of the octopus” with “coral where the octopus is concealed.”

She says HMM.
I DON'T KNOW, I THINK I
WANT TO ADD A LITTLE MORE
DESCRIPTION ABOUT
THE - I THINK I'M
GOING TO USE THE
WORD MOTTLED.
IS THE ENEMY, IT'S
NOT JUST THE ENEMY,
IT'S MORE THAN THAT.
LET ME JUST CHANGE THAT, AND
MAKE THAT MORE FORCEFUL.
THAT SOUNDS BETTER.
CRAWLS, IT DOESN'T
REALLY CRAWL... I KNOW,
I'M GOING TO MAKE
A MORE EXACT VERB.
HMM, I THINK I
MIGHT BE A LITTLE
MORE HAPPIER
WITH THAT ONE.
OKAY, YOU CAN SEE THAT
WHAT I HAVE DONE - OOPS,
I THINK I SHOULD GO BACK
AND DO SOME OF MY LAST,
I'VE SORT OF
GOT SOME IDEAS.
I'VE RESHAPED, I'VE
ADDED SOME WORDS,
I'VE CROSSED OUT,
I'VE CHANGED THINGS,
I'VE LOOKED FOR
MORE EXACT THINGS,
AND SORT OF THE LAST
STEP WOULD BE TO GO
AND LOOK FOR SPELLING.
I THINK MOTTLED
IS CORRECT.
OH, I KNOW WHAT, I FORGOT TO
PUT A CAPITAL ON THE WORD THE.
OKAY, I THINK THAT
ONE IS PRETTY GOOD.

The edited piece reads “The mottled moray eel is the bone of its existence. It creeps down into the coral where the octopus is concealed.”

Missus UJ says NOW, WHAT WE ARE
GOING TO DO IS,
TODAY WE'RE GOING TO LOOK
AT THE PROCESS OF EDITING.
AND WE'RE GOING TO TRY AND
GET AWAY FROM GOOD COPY
BAD COPY, AS BEING JUST
THE TWO THINGS WE DO,
AND WE'RE GOING TO BE
LOOKING AT EDITING AS A PROCESS.
NOW, I'VE GOT SOMETHING
VERY SPECIAL TO SHOW YOU.
AND FIRST OF ALL, I
JUST WANT TO SHOW YOU
SOMETHING THAT
LEADS UP TO THAT.
FIRST OF ALL:
NOW, HERE'S SOMETHING
REALLY INTERESTING.

She shows a copy of a magazine called “Italian food, wine and travel.” The cover lines read “Trent. Green Jewel of Italy’s Northeast,” “Desert Wine Recipes,” and “Inside The Last Supper.”

Missus UJ says I WAS ABLE TO FIND THIS.
AND YOU ARE JUST GOING TO
LOVE THIS BECAUSE YOU,
I'M SURE, CAN BE FABULOUS
LITTLE EDITORS
THIS MORNING, AND YOU
SHOULD BE ABLE TO,
FROM OUR SPELLING
TRICKY WORDS,
THAT THERE'S ACTUALLY A MAJOR
ERROR ON THIS MAGAZINE.
THIS IS A PUBLISHED
MAGAZINE.
IT'S OBVIOUSLY GONE THROUGH
THE - MANY DRAFTS WERE MADE.
IT'S GONE THROUGH
THE EDITING PROCESS,
AND THERE WOULD BE AN
EDITOR FOR THE MAGAZINE,
BUT THERE'S OBVIOUSLY A
VERY LARGE MISTAKE ON THERE.
NOW, IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO
CALL IN AND PICK THAT ONE OUT,
THEN I THINK WE COULD
TALK A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THAT.
SO I'LL JUST GIVE YOU A
SECOND TO SEE IF YOU CAN
FIND IT, AND CALL IN
QUICKLY WITH YOUR ANSWER.
HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says GOOD MORNING.

Missus UJ says HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says CAN YOU FIND THE ERROR?

The caller says YES, IT SAYS DESERT
INSTEAD OF DESSERT.

Missus UJ says CAN YOU FIGURE OUT
WHAT THE ERROR IS?
WHAT'S THE ERROR THAT'S
ON THE FRONT PAGE
OF THE MAGAZINE?

The caller says IT SAYS DESERT.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD FOR YOU.
NOW, THAT JUST ABSOLUTELY
WAS SO FUNNY BECAUSE
LAST WEEK, AFTER TALKING
ABOUT TRICKY WORDS,
I THOUGHT I KNOW I'M
NEVER GOING TO MAKE
THAT MISTAKE AGAIN.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THE
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DESERT
AND DESSERT
FROM LAST WEEK?

The caller says WE WEREN'T
HERE LAST WEEK.

Missus UJ says OH, YOU WEREN'T
THERE LAST WEEK.
OH, OKAY, WELL I'M GOING
TO SHOW YOU WHY MOST OF
THE KIDS WOULD BE
ABLE TO PICK THAT UP.
LAST WEEK, WE TALKED ABOUT
A WAY TO LEARN HOW TO SPELL
WOULD BE TO COME UP WITH
TRICKY WORDS AND THINGS.
SO WE LEARNED THIS IS
ALWAYS GOING TO BE DESERT
BECAUSE THE WORD DESSERT
HAS TWO S'S INSIDE,
AND IT STANDS FOR
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE.
OR THAT DESSERT
NEEDS TWO SECONDS,
OR YOU NEED TO HAVE TWO
HELPINGS OF DESSERT.
SO THAT WAS REALLY
INTERESTING.
THANKS FOR CALLING IN.
YOU PICKED THAT ONE UP.
YOU WERE A GREAT
LITTLE EDITOR, THANKS.
OKAY, NOW, WHAT WE'RE GOING
TO DO IS WE'RE GOING TO
TALK A LITTLE BIT ABOUT
THE EDITING PROCESS.

A caption on screen reads “Think of drafts before editing….”

Missus UJ says FIRST OF ALL, WHAT I WANT
YOU TO BE THINKING ABOUT
ALL THE TIME IS NOT MAKING
A GOOD COPY OR BAD COPY,
I WANT YOU TO THINK
ABOUT THE WORD DRAFT.
AND WITH IT BEING A PROCESS,
SOMETIMES YOU WON'T
BE HAPPY WITH DOING ONE DRAFT,
AND PERHAPS YOU'LL WANT
TO DO SEVERAL DRAFTS
BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY
DO THE FINAL EDITING.

The caption changes to “Reshaping the flow of ideas comes first!”

Missus UJ says NEXT THING IS I WANT YOU
TO BE THINKING ABOUT
THE IDEA OF RESHAPING
THE FLOW OF IDEAS.
REMEMBER WHEN YOU
WATCHED ME THIS MORNING,
WHERE I WROTE
SOMETHING DOWN,
AND THEN I WENT BACK AND I
DID LOTS OF THINGS TO IT.
I ADDED WORDS, I
CROSSED THINGS OUT,
I CHANGED THINGS, I
MADE MORE EXACT VERBS,
I ADDED ADJECTIVES,
UNTIL I WAS
VERY HAPPY WITH THE IDEA.
OKAY, LET'S TAKE A LOOK
AT WHAT RESHAPING MEANS.
OKAY, WHEN YOU
ARE RESHAPING,
WHAT YOU CAN DO WITH THIS IS
JUST TURN OVER YOUR AGENDA
AND YOU CAN COPY DOWN SOME
OF THESE IDEAS ABOUT
WHEN YOU ARE EDITING SOMETHING,
WHAT RESHAPING ACTUALLY MEANS.
GET OUT YOUR THESAURUS AND
SEE IF YOU CAN FIND A WORD
THAT ACTUALLY SAYS EXACTLY
WHAT YOU WANT IT TO SAY.
NOW, THE VERY LAST THING
YOU ASK IN THE RESHAPING
PROCESS IS, GEE, AM I
REALLY HAPPY WITH MY PIECE?
DO I LIKE HOW IT SOUNDS?
NOW, A GOOD WAY OF
DOING THAT, TOO,
IS WHEN YOU WITH WORKING
WITH YOUR CONFERENCE PARTNER
IS TO SAY, OKAY, COULD YOU
JUST READ ME MY PARAGRAPH,
OR COULD YOU READ
THAT BACK TO ME?
AND BY DOING THAT, YOU
CAN HEAR HOW IT SOUNDS.
AND SOMETIMES, IF
YOU HEAR THINGS,
AND IT'S CONFUSING TO YOU,
AND YOU'RE NOT HAPPY WITH IT,
YOU CAN GO BACK AND START
DOING SOME MORE RESHAPING.
NOW, IT IS TIME CONSUMING,
BUT WHEN YOU HAVE SOMETHING
REALLY SPECIAL, SOMETIMES
WHAT YOU CAN DO IS TAPE
YOUR STORY OR PIECE INTO
A TAPE RECORDER AND HEAR
YOURSELF READING IT BACK.
AND THAT'S A REALLY
GOOD THING TO DO
IN THE RESHAPING PROCESS.
NOW, IF YOU DIDN'T GET
ALL THOSE IDEAS DOWN,
PERHAPS SOMEONE
BESIDE YOU DID.
THOSE ARE REALLY IMPORTANT,
AND THEY SHOULD BE
IN THE MAINFRAME OF
YOUR AGENDA FOR TODAY.
NOW, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT
WHAT THE LAST STEP
IS GOING TO BE IN THE
EDITING PROCESS.
NOW, QUITE OFTEN KIDS
THINK ABOUT THAT
AS BEING WHAT EDITING IS.
BUT THAT'S REALLY
THE FINAL STEP.
SO WE WANT TO BE WORKING,
RESHAPING IS WHERE THE REAL
WORK AND THE PROCESS
COMES IN AND MAKING
SEVERAL DRAFTS OF
YOUR FIRST PIECE.
NOW, WHAT YOU SHOULD HAVE IS
A LIST OF EDITING SYMBOLS.
EDITING SYMBOLS ARE SYMBOLS
YOU CAN USE ON YOUR OWN,
OR YOU CAN WORK WITH
YOUR CONFERENCE PARTNER.
SOMETIMES YOU MIGHT DO SOME
GROUP EDITING AS YOU'RE
GOING THROUGH YOUR DRAFTS
AS YOU COME UP WITH
YOUR PIECE YOU'RE
HAPPY WITH.
WHEN YOU ARE WORKING
ON SOMEONE'S PIECE,
OR WORKING IN A GROUP, IT'S
GOOD TO HAVE COMMON SYMBOLS
THAT EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS.
AND I KNOW CONFERENCING
IS SUCH A BIG PART OF
OUR LANGUAGE PROGRAM THAT
THIS IS REALLY IMPORTANT.
SO HERE ARE SOME
SIMPLE ONES TO GO ON,
AND YOU CAN ADD TO SOME OF
THESE LISTS AS YOU NEED.
I USED THIS THIS MORNING,
MAKING A CAPITAL.
IF SOMEONE WAS EDITING MINE,
THEY WOULD HAVE PUT
THE THREE LINES
UNDER THE WORD THE,
AND THAT WOULD HAVE TOLD ME
WHEN I GOT MY PAPER BACK
THAT I SHOULD HAVE
PUT A CAPITAL.
NOW, YOU SAW ME DOING
A LOT OF CROSSING OUT,
AND THAT GENERALLY
MEANS CHANGING.
I PUT IN SOME OF THESE.
THAT MEANS TO INSERT,
WHETHER IT'S INSERTING A
PIECE OF PUNCTUATION, OR
INSERTING A SENTENCE
OR PIECE OF A SENTENCE.
THIS IS AN IMPORTANT ONE.

She points at a caret.

Missus UJ says THE SYMBOL FOR
NEW PARAGRAPH.

She points at a pilcrow.

Missus UJ says AND THAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT
BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY
THINGS IN OUR STORIES
THAT NEED TO PARAGRAPH,
ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE
INCLUDING DIALOGUE,
CONVERSATION, THERE SEEMS
TO BE NEW PARAGRAPH,
NEW PARAGRAPH, NEW
PARAGRAPH, QUITE OFTEN.
SO GET USED TO THAT ONE,
AND WHEN YOU ARE DOING
YOUR OWN, AND YOU ARE
CONFERENCING AND SO ON,
THAT'S A SYMBOL.
THIS IS A SHIFT SYMBOL.
A LOT OF SHIFTING SHOULD
GO ON AS YOU TAKE ADVERBS
AND PUT THEM ON AT
THE BEGINNING.
SHIFTING WORDS AROUND
FOR SENTENCE VARIETY.
THAT'S A KEY SYMBOL.

She points at a similarity symbol.

Missus UJ says YOU DON'T ALWAYS WANT TO
START YOUR SENTENCES
WITH NATURAL ORDER, THE
SUBJECT AT THE BEGINNING,
SO YOU SHOULD BE GETTING
USED TO SHIFTING THINGS
AROUND TO MAKE IT
MORE INTERESTING.
NOW, I'M GOING TO GET
YOU TO WORK THIS MORNING,
AND I'M GOING TO GIVE
YOU AN OPPORTUNITY
TO WORK AS AN EDITOR.
AND I'M GOING TO
PUT UP A DRAFT.
AND YOU'LL SEE IT HAS
A DRAFT STAMP ON IT.
AND WHAT WE'RE GOING TO
DO IS YOU'RE GOING TO,
WITH THE PERSON
THAT'S WITH YOU TODAY,
SEE IF YOU CAN EDIT THIS
PIECE BY DOING SOME RESHAPING.
YOU MAY WANT TO DO
SOME FINAL EDITING.
THERE MAY BE SOME CAPITALS
AND PERIODS MISSING.
YOU MAY WANT TO CHANGE
THE WHOLE THING AROUND.
MAYBE IT'S ALL ONE
RAMBLING, RUN-ON SENTENCE,
AND YOU THINK IT
SHOULD BE CHANGED.
NOW, I'M GOING TO
GET YOU WORKING.
LET'S TAKE A
LOOK AT IT FIRST.

A sheet of paper appears on screen. It reads “The octopus a creature with eight arms with rows and rows of suction cups the octopus swims around the reefs looking for food.”

Missus UJ says YOU CAN SEE I'VE GOT
MY DRAFT STAMP THERE,
SO THIS IS JUST SOMETHING
TO BE WORKED ON.
I'LL GIVE YOU A
COUPLE OF MINUTES.
START RESHAPING THE PIECE.
AND WHEN YOU HAVE
SUGGESTIONS AS AN EDITOR
OF WHAT YOU WOULD DO WITH
THIS PIECE, PLEASE CALL IN.
I'LL WAIT FOR YOU.
GET BUSY.
OKAY, WE'VE ALREADY GOT
SOME EDITORS CALLING IN
OF HOW THEY ARE GOING TO
RESHAPE THIS FIRST DRAFT.
HI, FROM KING
GEORGE, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HI.

Missus UJ says HI, WHO AM I
SPEAKING TO?

The caller says EVAN.

Missus UJ says HI, EVAN.
OKAY, EVAN, WHAT DO YOU
THINK WE SHOULD DO
WITH THIS PIECE IN THE
RESHAPING PROCESS?

Evan says ADD SOME PUNCTUATION.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
LET'S START WITH THAT.
YOU TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

Evan says CAPITAL ON THE T OF THE.

Missus UJ says RIGHT.
SO IF YOU'RE EDITING THIS,
THE SYMBOL YOU WOULD HAVE
DONE IS PUT THESE THREE
LITTLE LINES UNDERNEATH.
AND THAT WOULD HAVE TOLD
US TO PUT THIS UP TOP.
GOOD.
SO READ IT TO WHERE
THE PERIOD SHOULD GO.

She starts editing the piece.

Evan says PROBABLY AFTER THE
FOOD AT THE END.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
SO I'LL READ YOU
THE WHOLE THING.
IS IT GOING TO BE
ONE SENTENCE ONLY,
OR DO YOU THINK WE
COULD ADD A FEW MORE?

Evan says ADD A PERIOD
AFTER THE CUPS.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
SURE, OKAY, LET'S
START WITH THAT.
GREAT.
NOW, IS THERE ANYTHING
ELSE YOU WANT TO
CHANGE ON THERE?

Evan says A COMMA AFTER
THE OCTOPUS.

Missus UJ says THE OCTOPUS, GREAT.
NOW, DO WE HAVE
A VERB IN THERE?
REMEMBER, IF THE
OCTOPUS IS THE SUBJECT,
WE NEED A WORD THAT IS
GOING TO TELL US SOMETHING
THAT THE OCTOPUS IS DOING.
HAVE WE GOT A VERB IN THERE?

Evan says THERE'S NO VERB THERE.

Missus UJ says RIGHT.
SO WHERE WOULD
YOU PUT ONE IN?
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

Evan says OCTOPUS IS...

Missus UJ says GOOD FOR YOU.
THE OCTOPUS IS.
OKAY, A CREATURE
WITH EIGHT ARMS,
WITH ROWS AND ROWS
OF SUCTION CUPS.
OKAY, THANKS SO
MUCH FOR CALLING IN.
I'M GOING TO TAKE
ANOTHER CALLER.
WE'RE GOING TO PICK UP
FROM WHERE YOU LEFT OFF.
THANKS FOR CALLING.
HI, WE HAVE
ANOTHER CALLER.
OKAY.
SO THAT WAS GOOD.
PART OF THE RESHAPING,
TOO, IS LOOKING AT,
YOU KNOW, SENTENCES.
AND ONCE YOU'VE GOT
SENTENCES IN THERE,
IT BEGINS TO MAKE
SENSE, DOESN'T IT?
OKAY, HI, MIKE?

Mike says HI.

Missus UJ says IS THIS SOUTHWOOD PARK?

Mike says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI.
MIKE?

Mike says HI.

Missus UJ says HI.
SO WHERE WOULD
YOU GO FROM HERE?

Mike says OKAY.
CAPITAL T ON THE
SECOND SENTENCE.

She capitalizes the second “the” word.

Missus UJ says GOOD FOR YOU.
OKAY, IF YOU WERE WORKING
WITH YOUR FRIEND'S PIECE,
YOU WOULD PUT THE
SYMBOL UNDER THERE,
AND THAT WOULD TELL HIM
OR HER WHAT TO DO THERE.
OKAY, ANYTHING ELSE
YOU WOULD CHANGE?

Mike says I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
OKAY, GOOD, THANKS
FOR CALLING IN.

Mike says ALL RIGHT, THANKS.
BYE.

Missus UJ says BYE.
OKAY, WE'RE GOING TO
TAKE ONE MORE CALLER,
AND SEE IF WE CAN GET SOME
MORE RESHAPING GOING ON.
REMEMBER, RESHAPING
IS CHANGING THINGS,
ADDING DETAILS, INSERTING
WORDS AND SO ON.
WE DON'T WANT TO JUST
BE CHANGING SENTENCES.
ALTHOUGH, NOW IT REALLY
DOES MAKE SENSE
WITH THE TWO SENTENCES
IN THERE, DOESN'T IT?
OKAY, WE HAVE
ANOTHER CALLER.
GOOD MORNING.
HI.
WHO AM I SPEAKING TO?

Jamie says JAMIE.

Missus UJ says HI, JAMIE.
OKAY, WHAT WOULD YOU
DO WITH THIS, JAMIE?
HAVE YOU GOT SOME RESHAPING
THAT YOU WOULD DO TO IT?
ARE YOU GOING
TO ADD ANYTHING?

Jamie says A NEW PARAGRAPH
AT THE BEGINNING.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
GOOD.
BECAUSE THIS IS
THE VERY BEGINNING.
GOOD FOR YOU.
ANYTHING ELSE?

Jamie says I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.

Missus UJ says THERE CERTAINLY ISN'T
ANYTHING GRAMMATICALLY WRONG
WITH IT, IS THERE?
BUT WOULD YOU TALK ABOUT
HOW THE OCTOPUS SWIMS?
OR ANY SORT OF, REMEMBER
WE EXPANDED SENTENCES
USING ADJECTIVES AND
ADVERBS AND SO ON.

Jamie says SWIMS GRACEFULLY.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD FOR YOU.
I LOVE THAT.
OKAY, GOOD FOR YOU.
GREAT.
OKAY, THANKS FOR CALLING IN.

Jamie says OKAY, BYE.

Missus UJ shows another edited piece.

She says BYE BYE.
OKAY, THERE WE HAVE IT.
NOW, I'M JUST GOING
TO QUICKLY SHOW,
THIS IS SOMETHING THAT
ONE OF MY STUDENTS,
WHEN I HANDED IT TO HER THE
OTHER DAY BEFORE I CAME,
SHE DID A LOT OF CHANGING.
SHE LIKES TO SORT OF
DO A MESSY JOB HERE.
YOU CAN SEE SHE'S
DONE SOME CHANGING.
SHE HAS A LOT OF INSERTIONS.
AND HERE'S AN IDEA OF TAKING
THE ROWS AND ROWS OUT.
I'LL JUST READ
YOU THE PARAGRAPH.
“THE OCTOPUS IS A FASCINATING
CREATURE WITH EIGHT
SUCKER-EQUIPPED ARMS.”
SO THAT CHANGES THE
ROWS AND ROWS PART.
IT MAKES IT A
LITTLE LESS WORDY.
AND CHANGING, INSTEAD OF
HAVING THE OCTOPUS AGAIN,
USING A PRONOUN AND
CHANGING IT TO IT,
SO YOU'RE NOT ALWAYS
STARTING SENTENCES
THE SAME WAY.
AND THAT'S A BIG PART OF
THE RESHAPING PROCESS,
FINDING DIFFERENT
WAYS TO BEGIN THEM.
SO INSTEAD OF SWIMS, SHE
TOOK OUT SWIMS AND
PUT SLITHERS.
BUT ALSO JAMIE'S IDEA OF
SWIMMING GRACEFULLY
WAS A GREAT IDEA.
AROUND THE REEFS.
AND HOW DOES HE
OR SHE DO THAT?
WELL, THEY DO IT QUIETLY.
AND THEY'RE NOT JUST
LOOKING FOR FOOD,
THEY'RE SEARCHING
FOR, INSTEAD OF FOOD,
THE PERSON PUT IN
MORE EXACT NOUNS,
WHAT THEY WERE ACTUALLY
SEARCHING FOR,
BEING THE CRABS
AND CRUSTACEANS.
SO THAT'S GREAT.
YOU WERE GOOD EDITORS.
AND WHAT WE HAVE TO
REMEMBER TO DO IS TO DO
A LOT OF RESHAPING.
REMEMBER, THE SPELLING AND
THE PUNCTUATION
AND THINGS, THOSE THINGS
COME SORT OF LAST.
BUT IT WAS GOOD THE PEOPLE
PUT THE SENTENCES IN BECAUSE
WITHOUT THE SENTENCES, IT
DOESN'T REALLY MAKE SENSE.
SO ONCE YOU'VE
GOT SENTENCES,
AND YOU UNDERSTAND WHERE
THE PERSON IS GOING,
YOU CAN HELP THEM
ADD AND RESHAPE,
AND MAKE IT
EVEN BETTER.
NOW, I HAD SOME
MORE THINGS TO DO,
BUT BECAUSE WE WERE DOING
THE SHOWCASING THIS MORNING,
WE DIDN'T REALLY
HAVE AS MUCH TIME.
WHAT I WANT TO DO IS I
WANT TO TAKE YOU, NOW,
TO YOUR VIRTUAL CHALLENGE,
WHICH I'M SURE
YOU ARE JUST
GOING TO LOVE.
NOW, THE THING IS, IF YOU
WERE AN ELECTRICIAN
OR PLUMBER, OR WHATEVER YOU
DECIDED TO DO IN YOUR CAREER,
YOU CERTAINLY WOULDN'T
BE ABLE TO DO IT -
A DOCTOR WOULDN'T COME TO
YOUR HOUSE WITHOUT A DOCTOR
BAG OR WHATEVER - NO MATTER
WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO,
YOU NEED TO HAVE THE TOOLS.
SO I'M GOING TO SHOW
YOU THIS MORNING
HOW TO MAKE AN EDITING KIT.
NOW, IT'S NOT A WRITING
FOLDER BECAUSE A WRITING
FOLDER IS WHERE WE KEEP ALL
OF OUR PIECES OF WRITING.
THIS IS A KIT
THAT COMES OUT,
AND WE ACTUALLY CALL
IT AN EDITING KIT.

She shows a red folder named “Editing kit.”

Missus UJ says AND THIS KIT IS
SPECIFICALLY TO BRING OUT
WHEN YOU WANT TO EDIT.
YOU CAN MAKE THE EDITING
KIT WITH THINGS
YOU HAVE IN THE CLASSROOM.
OKAY, THIS IS MADE
OUT OF BRISTOL BOARD,
WITH MASKING TAPE, AND
A PIECE OF ACETATE.
I'M JUST GOING TO PUT IT
DOWN ON THE GRAPHICS CAMERA
SO YOU CAN SEE IT.
AND I THINK YOU'LL LOVE
TO MAKE ONE OF THESE.
WHEN YOU TAKE THIS
OUT, IT MEANS BUSINESS.
SPECIFICALLY, WHEN
YOU TAKE YOUR KIT OUT,
IT'S FOR THE PURPOSE
OF RESHAPING
AND EDITING YOUR
DRAFT COPIES.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT
IT AS I UNFOLD IT.
YOU CAN SEE, FIRST OF
ALL IT'S FULL OF STUFF.
IT'S A LARGE PIECE
OF BRISTOL BOARD,
AND THE LARGE PIECE
HAS BEEN FOLDED UP
TO MAKE THREE POCKETS.
I'M GOING TO SHOW
YOU THE FIRST POCKET.
THIS IS MY
FAVOURITE POCKET.
THE FIRST POCKET HAS
THE MATERIALS YOU NEED
TO WORK AS AN EDITOR.
AND I JUST KEEP THINGS
HERE IN A ZIPLOCK BAG.
SOME OF THE THINGS I HAVE
IN HERE, FIRST OF ALL,
I WOULD KEEP
MY DRAFT STAMP.
WHEN YOU ARE
WORKING ON YOUR OWN,
OR WITH A PARTNER
AND SO ON,
YOU ALWAYS PUNCH THAT
IT IS A DRAFT PIECE.
THESE ARE CALLED
DRY ERASE MARKERS.
SO WHEN YOU PUT YOUR PIECE
UNDER A PIECE OF PLASTIC,
YOU CAN DO ALL THE CHANGES
AND SO ON ON THE PIECE,
AND YOU CAN JUST TAKE A
LITTLE CLOTH LIKE SO;
IT'S CALLED DRY ERASE, YOU
MIGHT WANT TO WRITE THAT DOWN.
THEN YOU CAN TAKE A
LITTLE PIECE OF COTTON,
AND YOU CAN ERASE IT
OFF, SO THE PLASTIC
CAN BE USED OVER AND OVER.
NOW, WE HAVE ALSO LOTS OF
THINGS LIKE WHITE-OUT,
AND CORRECTION
TAPE, SCISSORS,
AND A GREAT THING TO HAVE
IN YOUR EDITING KIT,
ALSO, ARE POST-IT NOTES.
BECAUSE SOMETIMES THE PERSON
OR YOU MAY HAVE WRITTEN,
AND YOU CAN'T GET THE WHOLE
THING IN YOU WANT TO ADD
ON AND CHANGE IN THE
RESHAPING PROCESS.
SO BY USING A POST-IT
NOTE, WHAT YOU CAN DO
IS WRITE THE SENTENCE IN
THERE WITH AN ARROW,
AND POST IT ON
THE SECTION.
SO THAT'S A REALLY IMPORTANT
PART OF YOUR KIT SO.
YOU KEEP ALL THOSE
THINGS IN THE PLASTIC,
THEN YOU GO TO THE
OTHER PARTS OF IT.
THE SECOND PART
IS TO LOOK AT,
HERE WE HAVE OUR
THESAURUS RIGHT WITH US,
SO YOU CAN WORK ON
BUILDING YOUR VOCABULARY.
AND HERE WE HAVE LOTS
OF THINGS YOU CAN USE.
VOCABULARY IDEAS.
I WOULD KEEP MY VOCABULARY
AND CONCEPT BUILDERS IN HERE.
THINGS TO DO WITH THE PIECES
THAT YOU CAN PUT ON
THE DRAFT COPY, CHANGES
YOU WANT TO MAKE.
LOTS OF PAPER MARKED DRAFT.
ALSO THERE WOULD BE A NUMBER
OF PIECE YOU WOULD HAVE,
SUCH AS YOUR EDITING
SYMBOLS AND AS EDITOR,
THAT YOU WOULD
WANT TO USE.
WAYS TO CHANGE
SENTENCE ORDER,
SUCH AS FROM NATURAL,
SPLIT, INVERTED SENTENCES.
WAYS TO COMBINE
SENTENCES.
HERE WOULD BE
SOME EXAMPLES.
SO IF SOMEONE HAS SHORT,
CHOPPY SENTENCES,
AS YOUR CONFERENCE
BUDDY, YOU COULD SAY,
LET'S GO TO YOUR
EDITING KIT,
AND LET'S LOOK AT DIFFERENT
WAYS YOU COULD COMBINE IDEAS.
MAKING COMPOUND SENTENCES,
COMPLEX SENTENCES,
AND APPOSITIVES, WHERE YOU
USE A LOT OF COMMAS
AND HEADING THINGS UP.
SO YOU WOULD KEEP
THINGS IN HERE.
THESE ARE ALL
VOCAB IDEAS.
NEXT OVER HERE IS
THE THIRD PANEL.
AND THAT IS WORD STUFF.
AND HERE YOU WOULD KEEP
ALL OF YOUR THINGS THAT
WE WERE DOING LAST WEEK.
SPELLING GENERALIZATIONS,
YOUR LIST OF PROBLEM WORDS
THAT YOU WERE SUPER
SLEUTHING AND FINDING
THE WORDS THAT
RELATE TO YOU.
NOW, ON THE BACK PANEL,
THIS IS THE FUN PART.
YOU CAN SEE I HAVE A
PIECE OF PAPER IN THERE.
ALL THIS IS IS A
PIECE OF ACETATE.
WE HAVE TAPED THE ACETATE
TO THE BACK COVER.
AND THEN WHEN YOU ARE
WORKING WITH YOUR PARTNERS,
YOU JUST PUT THE PIECE,
THE DRAFT, UNDERNEATH,
AND YOU WRITE ON IT.
YOU CAN MAKE ANY
CHANGES THAT YOU WANT,
AND THEN YOU TAKE THE
COTTON AT THE END OF IT,
AND YOU JUST CLEAN IT OFF,
AND IT WILL BE READY AND
CLEAN FOR THE NEXT PIECE.
NOW, THAT IS AN EXAMPLE
OF ONE YOU CAN MAKE
RIGHT IN THE CLASSROOM.
I'M SURE YOU HAVE MOST OF
THESE TOOLS RIGHT THERE.
YOU CAN START COLLECTING
AT HOME ALL THE THINGS
YOU NEED FOR YOUR BAGGY
AND THE TOOLS OF THE TRADE
TO BECOME AN EDITOR.
AND IF YOU LOOK IN THE
DRUGSTORES AND SO ON,
THEY'VE GOT SOME
INCREDIBLE COLOURS
YOU COULD MAKE THE
NEON COLOURS AND SO ON,
AND YOU COULD HAVE A
LOT OF FUN WITH IT.
I'M SORRY WE'RE
OUT OF TIME.
WE ALWAYS SEEM TO
BE OUT OF TIME.
I CERTAINLY WOULD BE VERY
HAPPY TO STAY FOR THE NEXT
15 MINUTES AND ANSWER ANY
OF THE QUESTIONS THAT
YOU HAVE, OR IF YOU HAVE
SOME THINGS YOU EDITED
THIS MORNING, OR IF YOU'D
LIKE TO CALL IN YOUR ANSWERS.
GREAT, WE HAVE A
CALLER ON THE PHONE.
GREAT.
HI, COLLEGE AVENUE?
HELLO?
GOOD MORNING, PICK
UP YOUR PHONE.
HI, JOE OR CATHY?

Joe says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI.
DO YOU HAVE A QUESTION?

Joe says NO.

Missus UJ says OH, DID YOU HAVE SOMETHING
YOU WANTED TO ADD?

Joe says NOT REALLY.

Missus UJ says YOU'RE JUST
CALLING TO SAY HI?

Joe says OKAY, BYE.

Missus UJ says OKAY, BYE.
WELL, SOMETIMES IT'S GOOD
JUST TO BE HEARD, RIGHT?

She grabs a blue writing folder with a cover that reads “My editing kit!”

Missus UJ says IF YOU NEED TO CALL IN, JUST
WHILE WE'RE WAITING FOR
THE NEXT CALL TO COME IN, YOU
CAN ALSO MAKE THE EDITING KIT
OUT OF - SOMETIMES
IN THE SCHOOL,
I KNOW IN MY SCHOOL WE
HAVE BOXES OF THESE
OLD WRITING FOLDERS.
AND THESE WRITING FOLDERS
CAN BE USED TO TURN
INTO AN EDITING KIT.
THEY ARE CERTAINLY A
LITTLE MORE STURDY,
IF YOU WANTED TO USE THAT.
AND THERE ARE ALL THE
POUCHES THAT ARE THERE FOR IT.
HERE'S ONE I'VE MADE
OUT OF A WRITING FOLDER.
THE BACK PART OF IT DOES
HAVE A PLASTIC PIECE
YOU CAN ACTUALLY PUT YOUR
DRAFT COPY IN THERE.
HI, WE HAVE
ANOTHER CALLER?
HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HI.

Missus UJ says DID YOU HAVE A QUESTION?

The caller says MY PARTNER
CALLED IN ON ME.

Missus UJ says OH, SO YOU DON'T
HAVE A QUESTION?

The caller says NO.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE
YOUR EDITING KIT?

The caller says YEAH.

Missus UJ says OH, GREAT.
WELL, HAVE FUN WITH IT, AND
WE'LL TALK TO YOU NEXT WEEK.

The caller says OKAY.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
ANYWAY, WHILE WE'RE
WAITING FOR ANOTHER ONE,
I'LL JUST QUICKLY
GO BACK TO THAT ONE.
THE FOLDERS HERE ARE GREAT
BECAUSE YOU CAN SLIDE -
THERE'S ALL KINDS OF
POUCHES AND THINGS
IN THESE OLD WRITING
FOLDERS THAT YOU
WOULD FIND VERY USEFUL.
AND CERTAINLY WITH IT BEING
A LITTLE MORE STURDY,
YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO PUT IN
YOUR THESAURUS AND SO ON.
HI, GOOD MORNING?

The caller says HI.
WHERE DO YOU BUY
THE DRAFT STAMP?

Missus UJ says OH, ISN'T IT GREAT?
I GOT IT AS A
BUSINESS DEPOT STORE.
AND THEY HAVE LOTS
OF THEM THERE.

The caller says OKAY, THANK YOU.

Missus UJ says OKAY, YOU'RE WELCOME.

The caller says BYE.

Missus UJ says EVERYBODY LOVES THIS.
YOU CAN TAKE
ANOTHER LOOK AT IT.
IT'S GREAT.
IT'S JUST A PUSH THING.
IT SHOULD LAST FOR
A VERY LONG TIME.
I THINK THEY ARE PROBABLY
ABOUT FOUR OR FIVE DOLLARS,
BUT YOU WOULD HAVE IT FOR
YEARS IF YOU REALLY
LOOKED AFTER IT.
EVEN IF YOU AND YOUR
CONFERENCE BUDDY DECIDED
TO SHARE, OR EVEN IF
YOUR TEACHER HAS ONE,
YOU CAN ALWAYS BORROW
THAT STAMP AND STAMP
ALL YOUR THINGS DRAFT.
IT'S A NICE WAY TO
LET PEOPLE KNOW
IT WASN'T YOUR BEST. Hi.

The caller says HI.
HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE
TO MAKE THE EDITING KIT?

Missus UJ says IT DOESN'T
TAKE VERY LONG.
ONCE YOU GET THE BRISTOL
BOARD AND YOU FOLD IT,
AND YOU TAPE THE SIDES.
DO YOU WANT TO TAKE
A LOOK AT IT AGAIN?
OKAY, ALL YOU DO IS YOU
TAKE YOUR BRISTOL BOARD
AND YOU FOLD IT
AND YOU TAPE.
NOW, MY MASKING TAPE IS
NOT STICKING AS WELL
BECAUSE MY THESAURUS
IS VERY, VERY THICK,
BUT YOU CAN ALMOST
USE DUCT TAPE.
IT HARDLY TAKES ANY TIME
AT ALL TO MAKE THESE.
WHAT DOES TAKE A BIT OF
TIME IS TO COLLECT ALL
THE THINGS YOU WILL
NEED IN YOUR TOOL KIT,
SUCH AS YOUR DRAFT
STAMP AND SO ON.
BUT ALL THESE THINGS
YOU CAN, YOU KNOW,
BUY AT ALL THE
LOCAL STORES.

The caller says OKAY, THANKS.

Missus UJ says BYE.
OKAY, WELL, I'LL CONTINUE
TO TAKE MORE CALLS.
HI, JACK MINER?

The caller says HI.

Missus UJ says GOOD MORNING.
WHO'S THIS?

The caller says ERIC CLARK?

Missus UJ says HI, ERIC.
DID YOU HAVE A QUESTION?

Eric says NO, I HAVE SOMETHING
FOR THE OCTOPUS STORY.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD.
IS THIS ON THE
EDITING PART?

Eric says YEAH.

Missus UJ says GREAT.
I'LL JUST GET MINE
OUT IN FRONT OF ME.
OKAY, HOW DID
YOU RESHAPE?

Eric says FOR THE OCTOPUS, IT
IS A LARGE CREATURE.

Missus UJ says GOOD, OKAY, GREAT.
LET ME GET MY
RIGHT PEN HERE.
I DON'T WANT TO DO
IT WITH MY DRY ERASE.
IS A LARGE CREATURE.
KEEP GOING.

Eric says AND INSTEAD OF
ARMS, TENTACLES.

Missus UJ says GOOD, GOOD.
THAT'S BEING MORE
EXACT, ISN'T IT?
GREAT.
KEEP GOING.

Eric says THAT'S IT.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
THAT'S A LARGE
IMPROVEMENT.
AND WHAT YOU COULD ALSO
DO IS YOU COULD TAKE
THAT THESAURUS IN
YOUR EDITING KIT,
AND WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF
YOU WANTED TO FIND EVEN
A BETTER WORD FOR
THE WORD LARGE?
HOW WOULD YOU DO THAT?
WHERE WOULD YOU
GO TO FIND THAT?

Eric says THESAURUS.

Missus UJ says GOOD FOR YOU.
DO YOU USE IT A LOT?

Eric says NO, NOT A LOT.

Missus UJ says WELL, YOU SHOULD START
BECAUSE I THINK THAT
YOU'LL REALLY GET A LOT
OF SUCCESS OUT OF IT.
JUST REMEMBER TO ALWAYS
LOOK UP ROOT WORDS.

Eric says OKAY.

Missus UJ says KIDS HAVE A HARD TIME
FINDING STUFF BECAUSE
THEY KEEP FORGETTING
IT'S THE ROOT WORD.
FOR EXAMPLE, IF
THE WORD WAS SAID,
AND THAT'S A WORD WE'RE
ALWAYS OVERWORKING,
AND YOU WANT TO LOOK UP
WORDS WHEN YOU'RE EDITING
THE WORD SAID IS
OVERWORKED, OVERWORKED,
BUT YOU WON'T FIND SAID.
IT WILL BE UNDER
THE WORD SAY.
OKAY?
SO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO
REMEMBER THAT WHEN
YOU ARE LOOKING STUFF UP.
HI, OSBORNE,
GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI.
IS THIS MEGAN OR SHERRY?

The caller says SHERRY.

Missus UJ says HI, SHERRY.
DID YOU HAVE A QUESTION
ABOUT THE EDITING KIT?

Sherry says WE WERE JUST WONDERING
IF THE EDITING KIT
WAS THE VIRTUAL
CHALLENGE?

Missus UJ says YES, THE EDITING KIT IS
DEFINITELY THIS WEEK'S
VIRTUAL CHALLENGE.
AND I KNOW YOU WON'T
SEND IT IN TO ME,
BUT ONCE YOU MAKE IT,
YOU'LL NEVER WANT TO LET IT
OUT OF YOUR SIGHT BECAUSE
YOU'LL USE IT SO MUCH.
AND IT'S SO FUN TO HAVE A
KIT BECAUSE WHEN YOU
GET THAT KIT OUT, THAT
MEANS, LET'S EDIT.
SO IT'S REALLY FUN.
ENJOY.

Sherry says OKAY, THANKS.

Missus UJ says BYE.
MAYBE I DIDN'T MAKE THAT
AS CLEAR AS I SHOULD OF,
THAT YOUR HOMEWORK IS TO
MAKE THE EDITING KIT.
WHAT A NICE HOMEWORK
PIECE THAT WILL BE
IF WE HAVE A
RAINY WEEKEND.
THAT WILL BE GREAT.
OKAY, WE STILL HAVE MORE
CALLERS TO COME IN.
AND I HOPE THAT -
HI, KING GEORGE?

The caller says HI.

Missus UJ says GOOD MORNING.

The caller says IT'S ANDREA AGAIN.
I HAVE A QUESTION.
WHAT'S THAT
CORRECTION TAPE FOR?

Missus UJ says THE CORRECTION
TAPE IS TO PUT OVER,
WHEN YOU'RE
TYPING AND THINGS,
LIKE IF YOU WANT TO MAKE
A CORRECTION OVER
A COMPUTER PIECE
THAT YOU HAVE.
I'LL SHOW IT.
IT'S LIKE A POST-IT.
IT CAN JUST STICK
RIGHT OVER IT.

Andrea says WHY DON'T YOU
JUST USE WHITE-OUT?

Missus UJ says YOU CAN.
YOU CAN.
BUT WHEN I'M PUTTING
A KIT TOGETHER,
I SHOW YOU ALL THE TOYS
THAT YOU COULD GET.
IT'S A CORRECTION
AND COVER-UP TAPE,
WHERE YOU CAN ACTUALLY
POST IT OVER THE TOP.
BECAUSE SOMETIMES THE WHITE-OUT
GETS THICK AND MESSY.
I DON'T KNOW IF THAT
EVER HAPPENS TO YOU,
BUT SOMETIMES KIDS
HAND THINGS IN TO ME,
AND THEY ARE STILL TRYING TO
CLEAN THINGS OFF BECAUSE
IT CAN KIND OF GET MESSY.
AND SOMETIMES THE WHITE-OUT
GETS STICKY AND THICK.
SO IT'S JUST A DIFFERENT
WAY OF DOING IT.
BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO
HAVE ONE OF THOSE IN IT.

Andrea says OKAY.

Missus UJ says AND DON'T GO HOME AND TELL
YOUR PARENTS YOU HAVE
TO HAVE ALL OF THIS
FOR MONDAY, OKAY?
YOU CAN BE COLLECTING ALL
THESE THINGS, YOU KNOW,
OVER THE NEXT
LITTLE WHILE.
YOU MIGHT BE BABYSITTING
OR SOMETHING TO SAVE IT.
BUT THIS DRY ERASE, MAKE
SURE YOU GUYS WRITE THIS DOWN.
IT'S A SPECIAL
KIND OF MARKER,
AND YOU CAN GET IT AT ANY
OF THE BUSINESS STORES.
THAT'S A KEY THING.
OKAY?
THANKS FOR CALLING
IN, ANDREA.
OKAY, HI, WE HAVE A
CALL FROM JACK MINER.
IS THIS ERIN OR ANDREA?

The caller says ERIN.

Missus UJ says OH, HI ERIN.
YOU HAVE A QUESTION?

Erin says NO, ACTUALLY I HAVE THAT
THING FOR THE OCTOPUS.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD FOR YOU.
OKAY, BOY, YOU KIDS
REALLY ARE GOOD EDITORS.
I'M GLAD THAT YOU KEEP
CALLING IN WITH THESE.
OKAY, JUST LET ME GET
MY GRAPHICS FOR YOU.

Erin says THE CONCEPT BUILDER.

Missus UJ says OH, THE CONCEPT
BUILDER.
OKAY.
LET'S SEE, MAYBE I'LL JUST
GRAB A PIECE OF PAPER HERE.
OKAY, SO YOU'VE
GOT YOUR BOXES.
SO YOU'VE GOT OCTOPUS.
AND WHEN YOU THINK
OF THE OCTOPUS,
WHAT WAS THE LEFT SIDE?

Erin says EIGHT.

Missus UJ says ATE, LIKE TO
EAT, YOU MEAN?

Erin says THE NUMBER.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD FOR YOU.
AND WHY DOES EIGHT
COME TO MIND FOR YOU?

Erin says BECAUSE HE HAS
EIGHT TENTACLES.

Missus UJ says GOOD FOR YOU.
OKAY AND THEN FROM
THERE, THE RIGHT SIDE?

Erin says LEGS.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
OKAY, AND WHEN YOU
THINK OF THE EIGHT LEGS,
WHAT DOES THAT
MAKE YOU THINK OF?

Erin says SPIDERS.

Missus UJ says OH, THERE'S A GOOD IDEA.
THERE'S A SIMILARITY.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT'S
GOOD ABOUT THAT,
WHEN YOU ARE WRITING,
IS YOU CAN ALWAYS,
IT'S REALLY GOOD TO MAKE
METAPHORS AND SIMILES.
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS?
WHEN YOU ARE WRITING, WHEN
YOU WANT TO REALLY CREATE
A GOOD PICTURE, WHEN YOU
ARE DESCRIBING SOMETHING,
THEN WHAT YOU TRY
TO DO IS YOU TRY
TO MAKE A COMPARISON.
SO YOU MIGHT SAY THE OCTOPUS
IS NOT UNLIKE A SPIDER,
HAVING EIGHT LEGS.
I'M GLAD YOU DID THAT.
BECAUSE THAT BRINGS IN A
WHOLE NEW THING IN
THE WORD BUILDING, AND
IN THE CREATIVE WRITING
OF MAKING COMPARISONS.
SO THAT'S GREAT.
GOOD.
THANKS FOR CALLING
THAT ONE IN.
HI, CASEY?
STACY?
GOOD MORNING, HI.

The caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says THIS IS AMANDA.

Missus UJ says OH, HI, AMANDA.
SOMETIMES OUR COMPUTERS,
WE'RE EXPECTING SOMEONE ELSE.
BUT I'M GLAD
YOU'RE THERE.
NOW, DID YOU
HAVE A QUESTION?

Amanda says YEAH, I WAS WONDERING HOW
MANY PEOPLE YOU RECOMMEND
CONFERENCING WITH BEFORE
COMPLETING YOUR FINAL COPY?

Missus UJ says THAT'S A REALLY
GOOD QUESTION.
A REALLY GOOD QUESTION.
IT JUST DEPENDS ON
WHAT WORKS WITH YOU.
YOU MEAN HOW MANY
DRAFTS YOU WOULD DO,
OR WOULD YOU SIT
DOWN WITH A GROUP?

Amanda says JUST LIKE HOW
MANY PEOPLE?

Missus UJ says I THINK THE KIDS
FROM ELGIN AVENUE,
WHEN THEY SAT DOWN TO PUT
THAT NEWSPAPER TOGETHER,
THEY PROBABLY SAT
DOWN IN A TEAM,
AND THEY PROBABLY GOT
ALL THEIR IDEAS OUT,
AND DID A LOT OF ORAL
COMMUNICATION
BEFORE THEY EVEN
TURNED TO PAPER.
AND THAT WOULD
BE A GOOD WAY.
AND, YOU KNOW, THEY HAD
THREE OR FOUR KIDS.
I WOULD SAY ANYTHING MORE
THAN FOUR GETS REALLY
HARD TO CONTROL.
BUT CERTAINLY, IN THE
INITIAL IDEA STAGES,
THREE OR FOUR KIDS
WOULD BE GREAT.
BECAUSE FOUR BRAINS ARE
BETTER THAN ONE, RIGHT?

Amanda says YEAH.

Missus UJ says BUT WHEN IT GETS DOWN TO
ACTUALLY WORKING AND
DOING THE EDITING
UNDER THE ACETATE,
I THINK IT'S PROBABLY A GOOD
IDEA IF IT'S JUST ONE ON ONE.
BUT YOU COULD GO TO SEVERAL
PEOPLE WITH THEIR EDITING KITS,
AND THEY MAY
HAVE OTHER CHANGES.
BUT I THINK IT'S
EASIER JUST TO DO
A PARTNER THING
WITH THAT.

Amanda says OKAY.

Missus UJ says BUT GET IDEAS FROM
LOTS OF PEOPLE.
THANKS FOR CALLING.

Amanda says BYE.

Missus UJ says THOSE ARE ALL REALLY
GOOD QUESTIONS.
AND THERE ARE ALL SORTS OF
DIFFERENT WAYS
THAT YOU CAN USE
YOUR EDITING KIT.
HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI, IS THIS STEPHANIE?

The caller says THIS IS CHANTEL.

Missus UJ says HI, CHANTEL.
DID YOU HAVE A QUESTION?

Chantel says WE WERE CALLING IN FOR
THE CONCEPT BUILDERS.

Missus UJ says YES.

Chantel says OCTOPUS REMINDS
US OF COLOURFUL.

Missus UJ says OKAY.
JUST LET ME GET IT DOWN ON
THE PAPER SO WE CAN SEE IT.
SO THE FIRST THING WHEN YOU
THINK OF OCTOPUS
YOU THINK OF COLOURFUL.
WHAT WERE SOME OF
THE COLOURS YOU SAW
THERE THIS MORNING?

Chantel says ORANGE.

Missus UJ says YEAH, WASN'T
THAT AMAZING?
THERE WERE LOTS OF DIFFERENT
COLOURS FOR OCTOPUSES.

Chantel says YEAH.

Missus UJ says OKAY AND THE
RIGHT SIDE?

Chantel says CAMOUFLAGE.

Missus UJ says OKAY GOOD.
AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

Chantel says SURVIVAL.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD.
IS THAT WHAT YOUR
BOTTOM ONE IS?

Chantel says YEAH.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD.
CAN YOU EXPLAIN THAT TO ME?
TELL ME YOUR LITTLE ORAL
STORY ABOUT COLOURFUL
CAMOUFLAGE AND SURVIVAL.
THAT'S A GREAT ONE.

Chantel says HE OCTOPUS CAN
CHANGE COLOURS,
AND IT CAN GO TO CAMOUFLAGE,
LIKE WITH THE CORAL.

Missus UJ says RIGHT.

Chantel says AND IT HELPS IT SURVIVE.

Missus UJ says OKAY, THAT'S EXCELLENT.
NOW, I HOPE WHEN YOU ARE
DOING YOUR CREATIVE WRITING
YOU USE THIS IDEA OF
CONCEPT BUILDING.
BECAUSE YOU SEE HOW
IT GOT YOU THINKING?
AND MAYBE YOU STARTED
THINKING IN CERTAIN WAYS
THAT YOU MAY NOT HAVE.
SO JUST THOSE WHOLE IDEAS
OF PULLING IDEAS TOGETHER,
THEY'RE ALL IN THERE,
IT'S JUST A MATTER
OF GETTING THEM OUT.
SO BY THINKING LEFT
SIDE, RIGHT SIDE,
AND HOW DOES IT
MAKE YOU FEEL,
SORT OF BRINGS
IT TOGETHER.
THAT WAS A GREAT ONE.
THANKS FOR CALLING IT IN.
HI, COLLEGE AVENUE?

The caller says HELLO.

Missus UJ says HI.
IS THIS SARAH?

Sarah says YEAH.

Missus UJ says HI.
DID YOU HAVE A QUESTION
OR CONTRIBUTION?

Sarah says FOR THE OCTOPUS STORY,
INSTEAD OF SWIMS, JETS.

Missus UJ says INSTEAD OF SWIMS
WHAT DID YOU HAVE?
JETS?

Sarah says HE JETS ACROSS THE WATER.

Missus UJ says OH, GOOD, GOOD.
THAT'S A GOOD ONE, TOO.
GOOD.
I ALWAYS REMEMBER,
THIS IS A FUNNY STORY,
BUT MY BROTHER, WHEN HE
WAS IN GRADE 7 A MILLION
YEARS AGO, CAME HOME
FROM SCHOOL AND SAID,
SPELLING WAS SO
EASY IN GRADE 7.
WE HAVE WORDS
LIKE JET, G.E.T.
SO WHENEVER I
THINK OF JET,
I ALWAYS REMEMBER HIS
SPELLING MISTAKE.
THAT WAS A GOOD ONE.
CERTAINLY DOES, THE WAY IT
WAS SORT OF PUSHING AND
PROPELLING ITSELF, I THINK
JET IS A VERY EXACT VERB.
AND WHEN YOU ARE EDITORS,
IT'S GREAT TO THINK ABOUT
EXACT VERBS, AND EXACT
ADJECTIVES THAT REALLY
MAKE YOUR WRITING
COME ALIVE.
SO THAT'S GREAT.
HI, WE HAVE A CALL
FROM JACK MINER?

The caller says YEAH.

Missus UJ says HI, GOOD MORNING.

The caller says HEY.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF WORDS FOR
THOSE UNDERWATER THINGS.

Missus UJ says OKAY, SEA CREATURES
AND FEATURES?
OKAY.
DID YOU DO THE OCTOPUS?

The caller says YEAH.

Missus UJ says LET'S TAKE A LOOK
AT WHAT YOU HAVE.
OKAY, SO WHEN YOU
THINK OF OCTOPUS,
WHAT DID YOU
COME UP WITH?

The caller says WATER.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
OKAY.
DID YOU HEAR THE SOUND?
WE COULD MAYBE ADD TO
THIS BOX OVER HERE.
WHAT DID THE
WATER SOUND LIKE?
REMEMBER WHEN WE FIRST
WENT UNDER THE SEA?
DID YOU HEAR ANY
SOUNDS IN THE WATER?

The caller says IT SOUNDED LIKE BUBBLES.

Missus UJ says IT DID, DIDN'T IT?
WASN'T THAT A
WONDERFUL SOUND?
IT WAS SO MUCH NICER THAN
THOSE SAWS THAT WERE
TAKING DOWN THE
RAINFOREST LAST WEEK, EH?
OKAY, WHAT ABOUT
THE RIGHT SIDE?

The caller says SEA PLANTS.

Missus UJ says OH, THEY WERE GREAT.
I LOVED THOSE.
THEY WERE ALL
MOVING SO SLOWLY.
IF YOU WERE PULLING THIS
TOGETHER IN A STORY,
YOU COULD THINK ABOUT, TRY
TO REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAW,
AND HOW IT WOULD FEEL.
OKAY, SEE AND FEEL IS A
REALLY GOOD WAY OF WRITING.
OKAY, WHEN YOU THOUGHT OF
THE WATER AND SEA PLANTS,
WHAT DID THAT
MAKE YOU THINK OF?

The caller says ROCKS.

Missus UJ says GOOD.
WHAT KIND OF ROCKS DID
YOU SEE DOWN THERE?

The caller says HANG ON A SEC.
LEAVE ME ALONE.
I'M TRYING TO TALK HERE.

Missus UJ says THAT'S RIGHT.

The caller says IT MADE ME THINK OF
THESE HUGE CLUMPS
OF ROCKS BUNCHED
ALL TOGETHER.

Missus UJ says I THINK THAT'S
CORAL THAT WE SAW.
THOSE LITTLE CREVICES,
HOW CREATURES,
THE SEA CREATURES,
THEY GET SO NARROW
THEY CAN SQUEAK IN
BETWEEN THEM.
THAT'S GREAT.
OKAY, THANKS FOR
CALLING IN.
I THINK THAT'S ALL
THE TIME WE HAVE.
AND I'M GOING TO
HAVE TO SIGN OFF NOW.
I THINK WE HAD A GREAT
SESSION THIS MORNING,
AND I'LL LOOK
FORWARD TO NEXT WEEK.
I'LL JUST GIVE YOU A
LITTLE SNEAK PREVIEW THAT
NEXT WEEK IS GOING TO
BE REALLY SPECIAL,
BECAUSE A NUMBER OF
MY OWN STUDENTS,
FROM MY OWN SCHOOL,
ARE GOING TO BE MAKING
PRESENTATIONS FOR YOU.
SO GET READY AND BE THINKING
OF ALL THE DIFFERENT WAYS
THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO
IMPROVE YOUR ORAL AND
VISUAL COMMUNICATION.
SO WE'LL SEE
YOU NEXT TIME.
BYE, IT WAS GREAT.

A slate appears on screen. It reads “Please remember to log off! Pick up handset. Press number 7. Press 1 to confirm. Hang up handset. See you next time!”

Watch: Student Session 4A