Cheryl Jackson

Meeting Julie Payette

Sun, 18 Sep 11 19:12:59 GMT

When she shook my hand, hard, and gave me her rather confident look, I was sure we would not have a warm and fuzzy conversation about raising kids. How wrong I was. Julie Payette - astronaut, pilot, engineer, pianist, singer, speaker of five languages - was, is, a cool mom who has thought a lot about raising her two sons. And she was happy to share her experience.

So, how does a girl from Montreal become an astronaut? I asked Payette about her childhood, her interest in science, her parents. Then I asked her about her own two sons. How does she support their dreams? And how on earth do they live in the shadow of a mom who's an astronaut?

Payette was open and honest and gave some unexpected answers. She also weighed in on research that shows girls tend not to choose math and science as they get older. And not surprisingly, she emphasized instilling confidence, which she has a lot of.

We'll post that interview on our site in the next couple of days. It's not every day you get to hear what an astronaut thinks of her other great challenge - parenting. Stay tuned.

Anticipating Julie Payette

Fri, 16 Sep 11 15:22:19 GMT

I've just read Julie Payette's biography, and I feel so inadequate. I wonder if she'll look super-human when I meet her on Sunday.

The Canadian astronaut has a Bachelor of Engineering, Electrical cum laude degree from McGill, a Master of Applied Science - Computer Engineering degree from the University of Toronto, eighteen honorary degrees. She's won countless awards and scholarships, has a commercial pilot license, captaincy on a Tutor military jet, is a certified deep-sea diving suit operator. She speaks English, French and some Spanish, German, Italian and Russian. She plays piano and has sung with the Montreal Symphony Orchestra and Tafelmusik Chamber Choir. She's a Knight of the National Order of Quebec, an Officer of the Order of Canada, has carried the Olympic flag. Oh, and she's completed two space flights, logging more than 25 days in space as a Canadian Space Agency astronaut.

She's also a parent to two boys.

We're meeting up with Julie Payette at the Perimeter Institute for Theoretical Physics Physica Phantastica event in Waterloo, and we're going to talk to her not only as an astronaut, but as a parent. How did she achieve so much? Why did she do it all? What did her parents do to encourage her interest in math and science? How did being a girl affect her goals? And how does she encourage her boys to pursue their dreams?

I'm guessing she has some good advice to pass on to the rest of us. So stay tuned to tvoparents.com. We'll post our conversation next week.

Should School Fundraising be Banned?

Tue, 13 Sep 11 18:50:18 GMT

School fundraising has reared its head again, as it does periodically, and this time just before a provincial election. A report by Social Planning Toronto says school fundraising should be banned because of the inequality of it all. The report says some schools raise as much as $250,000 a year, others a meager $7,000. As the parent of three kids who've gone through elementary school in Toronto, I know this to be true. Our school would make $40,000 in a day at our May Fair. There was a small effort to share the wealth, but it amounted to very little.

The report suggested at the very least, some of the money raised should be pooled among all schools. That would solve the inequality issue, but it doesn't address the real question which is why are schools raising private funds in the first place?

We've talked about this here at TVOParents:

Premier Dalton McGuinty says he has no plans to ban fundraising, although his government did introduce new guidelines that took effect this fall. Money raised by parents is not supposed to be used for core activities or materials such as textbooks, instruments, science labs, etc. But let's not think that science labs and workbooks are all there are to education. Fundraising pays for field trips, extra sports equipment and all sorts of other things that enrich a child's experience at school. It means some kids get a different, and you could argue, better, education than others.

The Toronto District School Board is looking at the report and will consider having schools pool some or all of their fundraising. I can guarantee this won't go down well in Toronto's wealthier communities.

What do you think about it all? Should parents raise money for public schools? And if they do, should it be pooled?

Back to School Blues

Fri, 09 Sep 11 21:11:12 GMT

It took my husband and me a few days to figure out why we were feeling so blue. It finally came to us last night and was confirmed by my friend this morning. We have the back to school blues. And it's not even us going back to school. It's our kids.

In my friend's case, her son who was home for the summer went back to university. Her daughter had come home for a short visit and then headed back across the country to her university. Another of my Facebook friends posted "The house is quiet." All her kids had gone off to university or high school. She sounded sad, even in a FB post.

We don't even have to say goodbye to our kids. All our kids go to high school or university here in Toronto and they live at home with us. So why were we feeling so sad this week? My husband actually used the word 'broken-hearted'. I felt low and was trying to find all sorts of reasons for it - other family issues, work, the weather. But it's none of those things. It's that summer is over and our leisurely family times, even though they happened randomly, are over. The two kids in university are up to their eyeballs in homework already. Our high school daughter is focused on her new school and new and old friends. Everything's changed.

I used to love the fall, the start of school. I liked the structure of the days, the work, the weather, the sweaters and boots and warm, cozy foods, the excitement and promise of a new year. Now, I see fall as an end, not a beginning. That's selfish, I know, because for my kids it may well feel like the great new start it once did for me. But that's how it goes.

How are you feeling now that school's started?

Hard Body, Hard Mind

Tue, 23 Aug 11 17:03:11 GMT

Have you ever heard that saying, "hard body, soft mind"? Well, it turns out the opposite is true - a hard body helps create a hard mind.

This is a no-brainer to me. We know exercise increases blood flow, provides oxygen, helps immune systems, improves energy, etc, etc, etc. The brain is part of the body so all those benefits should extend to the brain, right?

I'm a pretty active person myself, so I was very interested in a radio interview I heard on the weekend about how exercise can slow the natural decline of our brain function as we get older. Yes! I really don't want to end up looking for my keys in the freezer some day. Research has shown an improvement in mental function scores by 15 - 20 percent in seniors who exercise just a few times a week. Exercise increases blood flow, oxygen and nutrients to the brain, it improves the way our bodies metabolise glucose as we age, and it improves something known as growth factors. Growth factors promote cell growth and protect against toxins and injury and help the brain grow new cells. In fact, exercise can actually cause your brain to grow bigger.

So, what does this have to do with kids and TVOParents? Well, it seems to me the best way to ensure we're active as we get older is to be active when we're younger, so starting with our kids makes a lot of sense. A child who never moves will likely not take to it very well when he grows up. A child who is used to running and playing and kicking a ball and riding a bike will probably want to carry that good feeling into adulthood.

My colleague Karen, who runs marathons and does Insanity workouts, is fabulous about keeping her 8-year-old son active. He's not on every community team or taking lessons, though. Instead, she gets him out to playgrounds (indoor and outdoor) as often as she can, they go for hikes, he rides his bike with his friends. And all of this from downtown Toronto. I'm pretty sure he'll keep moving for the rest of his life.

It's not always easy to convince your kids to get active. My kids actually rolled their eyes before I got out six words about the interview I'd heard. They know too well that I'm going to tell them yet another reason why they should exercise. I'm really hoping, at the very least, that they're watching and learning, and will some day go for a run, swim rather than float, and try new activities to see if they like them. And I hope I'll be old enough, and healthy enough - body and mind - to see them do it.

Here's what we have to offer on the topic: Healthy Bodies, Healthy Minds and How to Get Your Family in a Healthful Frame of Mind.

Now, get moving!

When Kids Spend Time in Nature Good Things Happen

Mon, 22 Aug 11 16:37:12 GMT

Thanks to my friend Brian, I have this great story to share with you from TechCrunch. It's about a 13-year-old boy who looked up at the oak trees in New York's Catskill Mountains and came up with a design for a more efficient solar array. He speculated that the pattern of the leaves helped photosynthesis, so he built a test model and he was right. It did generate more power. How cool is that?

I like this story for so many reasons. First of all, he was observing nature when he came up with his idea. That means he was IN nature. I wonder what he was doing. Was he was hiking in a forest or sitting on a deck surrounded by trees, or was he was lucky enough to be lying back on the grass looking up at the canopy above him, with nothing to do but contemplate what he saw?

Secondly, he had the time and support to actually contemplate something, and then to build it and test it. That's a gift in our busy, busy world. Thirdly, this is science at its best. Observation, design, problem-solving, testing. And it was all done in a natural environment that's available to everyone, if we make room for it.

I'm a huge believer in the power of nature in kids' lives. It's their natural school where they learn to observe, to solve problems, to think about big questions like "where did all of this come from" and "how does this work". It's quiet and calm, yet playful, and because something is always about to happen, we're alert. It's a perfect balance if you ask me.

We've explored this idea a lot here on tvoparents. Here's a great video of a group of kids right here in Ontario who call themselves The Solar Inventors.

We also have a discussion about Nature Deficit Disorder. Yes, there's actually a term for it. And we've talked about how to get kids hooked on science.

You don't need to make your way to the Catskills. You can get the same benefit in fields, parks or even your own backyard. The trick is to let your kids play and explore and just hang out with trees and grass and sticks and stones. They're learning. A lot.

A Back Yard Book Club

Wed, 17 Aug 11 19:26:50 GMT

I heard a lot of compelling, inspiring stories and ideas yesterday, but one stood out from the others. I wish I had video to show you but I don't, yet, so I'll tell you about it.

Imagine a house in Markham with a big back yard, a deck with pergola, a pool, flowers, grass. Now imagine almost every available space filled with chairs and people of all ages, many of whom are new or second-generation Canadians from African or Carribean cultures, and all with a book in hand. The same book. Like a book club.

It IS a book club. The Nubian Book Club. The host of the book club, Donna Cardoza, told the story of her club at the York Centre for Education and Community Summer Institute, and at the end of the workshop she invited all of us to come to the next one. At her home. Dinner will be served. South Africa Consul General, Tselane Mokuena, will speak. Participants will read and discuss this summer's books, The Making of a Man by Dwayne Morgan and Making It by Carl James. In the fall, the book club moves indoors to Milliken Mills High School.

Donna likes to think of her book club as a family, all ages coming together to openly share their thoughts and opinions on important topics. "Newcomers want activities for the whole family, like they had back home," she said. On the club's website, she writes, "The VIPs at the book club are the students. We got to know them, where they are going and how we can help them accomplish their goals....we use literacy to facilitate their development socially, academically and culturally. We needed to show our kids we can do more than just drop in to a basketball game, we can do more than just sit at the computer. We challenged them and they met the challenge."

Don't you wish every teacher, every classroom operated on the same principles? Get to know your students, invite them to read and discuss big ideas, share food and conversation, and have them leave inspired to be the best they can be?

I'm so glad I heard about the Nubian Book Club. I wish there were one in every corner of the city. We've met some other amazing people who encourage literacy. Our producer, Albert Wisco, spent a day at Joyce Public School in inner city Toronto where students share their family's immigration stories in digital comics or graphic novels. He's posted a sweet little video of their experience.

So, how could you set up your own back yard book club?

Something to Think About as You Get Ready for School

Mon, 15 Aug 11 19:11:38 GMT

I had a bit of an "ah-ha" moment at my yoga class Sunday morning. I have to share it with you because I have a feeling it will mean something to all of you parents out there preparing for the upcoming school year.

My yoga teacher, whom I adore, does this great thing at the end of every class. She reads something to us as we lay exhausted and peaceful on the floor in shavasana. I call it a reading, which sounds like something you might hear in church, and I guess it is. They're words of wisdom to take with you into your real life beyong the yoga studio.

This week, she read from The Miracle of Mindfulness by Thich Nhat Hanh. It's part of a conversation between the narrator and Allen, husband to Sue and father to two young children. Here it is:

"Then Allen said, ' I've discovered a way to have a lot more time. In the past, I used to look at my time as if it were divided into several parts. One part I reserved for Joey, another part was for Sue, another part to help with Ana, another part for household work. The time left over I considered my own. I could read, write, do research, go for walks.

But now I try not to divide time into parts anymore. I consider my time with Joey and Sue as my own time. When I help Joey with his homework, I try to find ways of seeing his time as my own time. I go through his lesson with him, sharing his presence and finding ways to be interested in what we do during that time. The time for him becomes my own time. The same with Sue. The remarkable thing is that now I have unlimited time for myself!'"

I love this. This is 'mindfulness', that state of observing what's happening right now, right here. I'm going to keep this in mind when school starts and I start sinking into resentment over the time I'm spending helping my child navigate homework and deadlines and social situations.

I hope you find it helpful.

Toronto Libraries

Fri, 12 Aug 11 16:43:04 GMT

A few weeks ago, I was at the Toronto Reference Library. It was evening and I was there to co-host the Premier's Awards for Teaching Excellence which was being held in a beautiful room upstairs. To get there, I had to walk across the main floor and up some stairs which gave me a good view of the place.

It was packed. Absolutely packed. It was as crowded as any grocery store after work. The tables were full, the computers all busy, there was a lineup at the desk. It was almost shoulder to shoulder as I made my way through the turnstile.

For some reason, this surprised me. Perhaps because I don't use the library so much anymore I assumed no one did. When my kids were young we used our local library all the time - we browsed and borrowed books, CDs, DVDs, we went to storytime, we used the computers, we took mom and tot music classes. Now that they're older, they go on their own or use their school libraries, and I tend to buy my books. At the Regina Central Library, which I used before I moved to Toronto, I visited the fabulous Dunlop Art Gallery and rented art for my house (why don't more libraries offer this great service?). That's also where I taught, or tried to teach, my dad how to use email.

My dad visits the library every day. He loves that place. When we were kids, he took my brother and I on weekends. He would go upstairs, to the 'adult' section, and my brother and I would run around the kids' section downstairs, listening to storytime, reading books, and getting some to take home. Every weekend. I knew that place inside out.

Clearly, lots of Torontonians are still using the libraries. In fact, for some people, it may be the only time they get to access a computer or take a book home. It's also vital that kids get to know libraries, where books, computers and learning are the focus.

Here at TVOParents, we've asked experts about school libraries. Do school libraries need to have books, or are computers enough?

How do you use your library? What would you do if it were closed?

The London Riots and Teaching Self-Control

Wed, 10 Aug 11 17:00:06 GMT

I found this on Twitter, a parenting blog called "The London Riots - Teaching Self-Control". It may seem a bit of a stretch to tie the violence in Britain to kids' behaviour, but I think there's something here.

First of all, the London riots are a complicated mess. There is no one reason for the violence, the looting, the arson. Analysts are working overtime trying to figure it out. Some say the young looters are the "unentitled", kids without hope. The BBC's website contains a feature page of analysis, asking if technology is to blame for the riots, and what turns people into looters? Today's Globe and Mail editorial asks, among other things, "where are the parents of the teenage thugs? What happened to the other restraints that typically prevent human beings from turning on others?"

I'm asking the same questions today. There's no doubt in my mind that these young rioters are disenfranchised and feel they have nothing to lose. They're poor, they have no job prospects and if they watch the news they probably just want to curl up and die. Instead, they're having a mass tantrum, that dreaded tirade most kids learn to control around the age of four. In the long term this may help them, if the government wakes up and starts investing in young people. In the short term it won't, but they don't seem to know what else to do. What happened when they were kids? Where is their self-control? They know what they're doing is wrong, but they do it anyway. They could walk away from the group, but they stay.

This idea of self-control, or self-regulation, has been getting a lot of attention in teaching and psychology circles lately because it's a predictor of success. It makes sense. The child who learns to control his or her impulses is more likely to manage in the classroom, at home and at work. So, why do some of us have more of it than others? Can we teach self-control?

Psychology and philosophy professor, Stuart Shanker, talked to me about self-regulation and describes the famous 'marshmallow test.' He's an expert on this topic and worth listening to. We've explored the idea of attachment, the way parents bond with their babies, which affects self-regulation and we've learned about research that shows reading with your child increases empathy, or our ability to understand others' feelings.

All of this has something to do with what's happening in Britain. It can't be ignored.